Archives for the month of: October, 2012

Hello! I hope you are doing as well as possible after Sandy hit us with her best shot. This is a post from two years ago when we experienced some crazy weather; but since today is October 31st, if you’re more in the mood for a Halloween-themed post, check out Wherever You Go, There You AreAmerican Horror Story or Fear Factor). Stay safe everyone!

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At a recent and much overdue reflexology session with my friend  Noga Kreiman, I tried to sum up the tumultuous happenings within and around me these past couple weeks that culminated in my visit to her.  As we looked out the window at the fallen trees in her Park Slope backyard she very aptly said, “Sounds like you had your own personal tornado!”

Last week violent weather unleashed its power on much of the Northeast, with the NYC area hit pretty hard.  If you weren’t addressing the external collateral damage or power outages it caused, there’s a good chance you might have been dealing with some other sort of inner or outer turmoil in your life.

In times like these, it’s important to embrace the destruction and changes taking place, recognizing that often old structures and behaviors need to be demolished and uprooted in order for new ones to be rebuilt stronger and better. Don’t neglect whatever the eye of the storm, and its aftermath, are telling you to pay attention to.

We also need to ask for help when we need it, as difficult as it may be to admit and take that step to reach out. Staying isolated is a fast track into a downward spiral, just like a twister that touches down and in seconds wreaks arbitrary and unnecessary havoc.

So if you are a bit distressed, or feeling like Sting circa 1979, don’t wait for a hundred billion bottles to wash ashore; simply give me a buzz, or send me an email message, and I’ll be that lifeline to bring you safely back to drier land and calmer skies.

(Today’s PGG was originally posted on September 21, 2010.  For similar thoughts on this topic check out: Mercy Mercy Me, The Roof is On Fire, The Heat is On/Under Pressure, and Out of Control.) 

P.S. Check out two new mini-videos:  Never take a job just for the money and Why are you doing what you’re doing? excerpts from my recent talk at SIBL.  

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Synergy – the bonus that is achieved when things work together harmoniously. ~ Mark Twain

I find it curious that the words desperate and disparate sound so similar; and although their meanings are distinct and technically have nothing to do with each other, I think there is a correlation.

A well known strategy used by one group to influence power over another is to ‘divide and conquer’; to keep people, things, countries, ideas, religions, and feelings separate and often opposed to one another.  This way they are unable to come together as a unified force and therefore have strength to accomplish their goals and objectives, which dis-empowers them. Regardless of whether the power desired or deserved outcome on either end is good or bad, it is a tactic that is extremely effective.

The most obvious place to observe this happening is in the military and political arenas, but there are more subtle ways that this truth can affect us in our everyday lives – within our families, at our jobs, in our neighborhoods, in the media and entertainment we consume  and often, within ourselves.

Lately I’ve noticed a lot of folks are feeling disjointed, fragmented and compartmentalized at best; discombobulated or defeated at worst.  Everywhere we turn there seems to be  a sledgehammer creating wedges and a myriad of distractions coming at us from all sides: it’s us against them, head against heart, black vs. white, profit versus purpose, logic battling intuition, young vs. old;  material values vs. spiritual ones, mental vs. emotional health vs. physical health.

As the saying goes, we can’t serve two masters – we must be unified in that which we revere and honor, integrate our disparate parts and connect to who we are, so that we can connect to others for the greater good.  Because when we don’t, we  feel lost and alone, which when not addressed, can lead to feeling desperate. And that is never a good place to be – because decisions made from fear and desperation are never the best choices.

So if you’re having a little trouble synthesizing your yin with your yang, make sure you take some quality time with yourself and/or give me a buzz; just like Stevie and Paul’s piano, I’ll help arrange all your internal and external parts in a way that you, too, can live with yourself, and others, in perfect harmony.

(Today’s PGG was originally posted on April 5, 2011)

P.S. Check out two new mini-videos:  Never take a job just for the money and Why are you doing what you’re doing? excerpts from last week’s talk at SIBL.

And that would be….ME!  Yes, you receive these tidbits and thought-provoking essays every week at no charge, so every once in a while I have to do some shameless self-promotion, ’cause a girl has got to eat. And of course, perhaps you can benefit as these folks have!

As you know, for the past month I’ve been asking through an anonymous survey what you thought of PGG as well as my speaking and coaching services.  Thank you to everyone who took the time to respond and for your very generous feedback and valuable suggestions.

I thought I might share a few of the written responses here; if you were thinking of working with me as a coach it might give you a better idea of what to expect, or if you’re not sure how to describe me to a friend you can just forward them this email!

Be sure to scroll down for some of my upcoming speaking gigs, and please note that our regularly scheduled program will resume next week…

P.S. Remember you can always get your PGG fix by clicking on the archives below which has every post from the past two and a half years.

With over 50 comments from the survey results to choose from, some themes definitely emerged and I’ve tried to capture them here – hey, at least I’m consistent!  

She has a laid-back approach, but don’t let that fool anyone. Her ability to read people is amazing and her assessments of how a person can enrich their lives/careers are spot-on. After she asked me lots of questions, she was somehow able to give me an assessment that was frighteningly accurate and illuminating.

She’s really understanding and inspiring. Coaching sessions are not a simple  “make your resume look like this and you’ll get a job” – Kristina gets to the bottom of your issues and brings them to the top. I always leave a session feeling refreshed and inspired. 

Kristina is a special person with a singular passion for empowering people to get the most out of their lives.  Most notable is her rare quality to really get to the root/essence of a person/issue and make people feel as though they are being focused on deeply and solely—she is not thinking about anything other than YOU and your situation and what she can do to help guide and make things go on a better path.

I thank Kristina for looking beyond the descriptions of what I’ve told her regarding my current situation when advising me. Kristina looks at what you don’t say as opposed to what she thinks you want to hear.

I appreciate the way Kristina can blend all the facets of life/career from the corporate world to astrology to physical health-she has a bird’s eye view of all these realms and more which make her very helpful to me. Like a really smart Mom.

Kristina does business with HEART. Her insight and intuition are very strong. She cares very deeply when she works with you and you feel very taken care of.

She never deals with the “surface” issues. She makes you delve deep to get at the root issue to put you back on the right path for it to no longer be an issue in your life. She makes the personal work just as important (sometimes more important) as professional/business stuff. I BELIEVE she wants the best for me and that I’m not just another client.

Her no nonsense way of relating information. In my experience, Kristina is more blunt and honest which is appreciated!

I like everything about how Kristina works because it almost seems custom made for the individual she is working with. 

Kristina gave me permission to be myself!  I can say no other person has empowered me in that way as much as she has – and I am TRULY forever grateful for that.   

A session with Kristina is always an investment in myself. I never feel like any time was wasted and I always leaving feeling better and more inspired than I did when I got there.

In the year 1492 Columbus sailed the ocean blue…Whether or not you approve of the outcome of that fateful voyage of the Nina, Pinta and Santa Maria, we can all learn from Columbus’ extreme act of faith and belief in himself when he left to explore a New World despite all odds.

Albert Einstein believed in intuition and inspiration, saying “Imagination is more important than knowledge”.  The greatest discoveries in the world are often based on hunches, on people with a vision and certain knowingness, and then moving forward with courage, determination and perseverance, they set out to prove it.

People may think you’re crazy, want to dissuade you, say your theories are wrong; even those closest to you who have the very best of intentions can only project their version of the truth and what they think is right.  But they simply may not understand, and at the end of the day, we must be the captain of our own ship.

Once you embark on that journey, you will always encounter stormy skies, dis-ease, and potential mutiny along the way, whether from external sources and naysayers or internal voices of doubt and despair from your ego trying to take over what your heart and gut knows to be true, without the proof and evidence yet in existence. But we must remain steady as she blows!

We each have an internal compass, our own personal North Star which may very well lead us on a different path from everyone around us or society as a whole.  We are unique beings, so only you know what’s right for you and ultimately the direction you want to be going in.  And if you’re wrong or it doesn’t work out the way you planned, at least you will have tried, and will learn and grow along the way. You may even find something better than what you originally envisioned…

So if you need a little adjustment of your internal GPS,  an experienced cartographer, or just some help handling what Mother Nature throws your way, give me a buzz and I’ll be the wind that gives lift to your sails, assists in navigating those uncharted waters and supports you in staying the course!

LAST CHANCE: Click here for a survey to tell me what you think about my stuff and get a $10 discount on my services!

Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. ~ C.S. Lewis

Despite what Simon & Garfunkel once sang, we are not rocks, nor islands, as many of us (especially those drawn to live in the metropolis that is New York) might want to be. The irony of course is that the very nature of being human means we are part of a greater whole and must interact with other human beings on many levels. Yet a sense of connection and belonging doesn’t always come from the family, tribe or culture we are born into so we must create that connection authentically first within ourselves and then with others.

Relationships are one of the most difficult areas for us homo sapiens to navigate, and they are the biggest source of our pleasure as well as our pain.  The past three years or so we have had an advanced course in them; I for one can say as difficult as it’s been, have learned some new and deeper versions of lessons I know will serve me well in the future, all of which culminated in a super-summer intensive, with this harvest season reaping the wisdom culled from that journey.

Some of those nuggets include: finding the balance between losing ourselves/being co-dependent versus isolating and becoming a monk (or a psychopath); having boundaries and not taking on/feeling responsible for another’s emotional or other type of well-being; nurture yourself, no one can know exactly what you need but you; see a person and a relationship as they really are, not how you’d like them to be. And regarding those close/intimate relationships that are more difficult or challenging, keep in mind that person – whether parent, boss, spouse, sibling, lover, friend, child – is just the actor playing the role in a scenario you have created in order to heal and grow. 

Lastly, the people you choose to allow into your life – your friends/boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/partner should meet certain criteria. The word ‘friend’ especially has been so diluted and watered down with the use of Facebook and social media you need to be able to separate the wheat from the chaff and discern the  Apples from Oranges

The foundation of a relationship with anyone deserving of your time and energy must include understanding, appreciation and respect – you should be able to check off at least two of these to be considered a friend, and if you are fortunate to have someone in your life who truly understands, appreciates and respects you, you are very, very lucky and should treasure and honor that relationship for the special gem that it is.

The bottom line is, You Gotta Have Friends, and making time for friendships and your most important relationships is not a luxury but a necessity. It’s easy to get caught up in the day to day busy-ness of life, but we need to discipline ourselves to create space for connecting with the people who love and accept us, who know and understand us, with whom we share interests and history, and have grown together, not apart.

Not sure who are your buds and who are the duds in your life? Give me a buzz and we’ll see which relationships are ripe for the pickin’ and which ones have taken a lickin’!

LAST CHANCE: Click here for a survey to tell me what you think about my stuff! 

P.S. Check out this article I was quoted in last week! Five Ways to Ace a Networking Meeting on FindtheRightJob.com 

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