Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others. ~ Brene Brown

The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable. ~ James A. Garfield

We’ve had many truths exposed these past few weeks with the explosion of #metoo and a multitude of people coming out about the sexual abuse/harassment/assault they have experienced, particularly in the hands of someone who had power or authority over them in some way.  Although shocking and beyond unpleasant to admit to as a society, this is a liberating, learning and healing moment and is best not filled with hate and vengeance.

Whether or not you are one of those who has encountered such situations directly –  on either side of the equation – there are other ways we can all think about what’s happening and how we can apply it to our lives, because at the root of this issue is the concept of boundaries which is something, if you are human, you are dealing with on a daily basis on many levels, not just sexual.

As whole, complete adults, one of the most important things we can do for our mental, emotional and physical health is know who we are and where, when or how we may or may not be compromised at the least, or invaded and violated at the worst. We can then assert or protect ourselves with integrity; doing so is an essential demonstration of self-love and self-care and can have many manifestations, in all aspects of our lives.

The more subtle example is when someone crosses the boundaries of what you have determined to be your needs regarding your time and energy.  As I say in every one of my talks and to all of my clients, your time and your energy is your most precious resource – so how are you using it, and/or how might you be letting others abuse or  “steal” it from you? 

We live in the School of Life and therefore there are tests –  stresses and strains to help mold and shape us into who we are; they are the means by which we can uncover what is true for us. To give meaning and definition to our existence we need resistance, we need friction, we need to be challenged from time to time.  We can then know ourselves even better and strengthen the core muscle of who we are.  We become more integrated and we heal. So yes, others will test our boundaries, but tests are the grit of life and what ultimately inform us about our deepest sense of selves, create our reality and help us to grow and evolve.

When tested, you need to “stand up for yourself” but first you need to know who that self is. What defines you? What makes you you? What constitutes your self-preservation? These are where boundaries come in.  If someone is not respectful of them or your time and energy you must be okay to walk away, you need to be okay to say NO and deal with the consequences.  I realize this is easier said than done, especially when other factors like fear, intimidation, blackmail and/or violence are part of the equation, but I am talking about having a baseline foundation of self-worth and self-respect, that when developed can actually act as a preventative measure in that those types of situations will become less likely to occur because of your vibration.

Anything you are going through is an opportunity for growth and healing for you and the other parties involved depending how each one relates to the process. What are you currently being confronted with? Is there something you need to change or something you need to defend?   

This means it’s a time to stretch your muscles and question yourself – take an honest look at your behavior, beliefs and choices. How malleable can you be? Some things are not meant to be malleable if you have worked on them over time, and some things are in fact meant to be impermeable. 

But this is not about being rigid – it’s about knowing your core values and taking a stand for them when necessary.  It’s about not letting anyone question you or convince you otherwise after you’ve already explored/seen/experienced evidence and come to a conclusion, keeping in mind your reaction shouldn’t be automatic – as perhaps there is room for growth, change, adjustment, or another point of view. Take a minute or a day if necessary to reflect, but if you are clear with yourself and you’ve done conscious work and have experience that proved itself to be true, then then you are just being tested to see if you will unapologetically stand in that truth. This forms the foundation of who you are and cannot be shaken. 

From microcosm to macrocosm, it’s important to know what is or isn’t acceptable to YOU – whether in your personal or professional relationships or in relation to the world and culture at large –  and not be influenced by who is the loudest, meanist, most patronizing, or anyone trying to make it seem like you are unreasonable or crazy just because you are not going along with crowd.

We are living in extraordinary times, and with social media our lives are now magnified, exaggerated, distorted and accelerated, so it is even more crucial that we know who we are and not be be swayed by or swept up in the currents of the day.  We have to find the balance between our individuality, relationships and the group mentality; when not to overstep, how to protect and when to stretch our boundaries.  And to understand that some things, like love, compassion, and empathy know no boundaries.  

Need a little help preparing for any upcoming exams or pop quizzes? Give me a buzz and I’ll be the tutor to drill you with the exercises and shifts you need to be as strong as you can be to handle whatever life throws your way to see what you’re made of!

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This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

 Like us on Facebook    Follow us on Twitter   View our profile on LinkedIn  View on Instagram                 

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

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Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival . ~ C.S. Lewis

Despite what Simon & Garfunkel once sang, we are neither rocks, nor islands, as many of us (especially those drawn to live in the metropolis that is New York!) might want to be. The irony of course is that the very nature of being human means we are part of a greater whole and must interact with other human beings on many levels. Yet a sense of connection and belonging doesn’t always come from the family, tribe or culture we are born into so we must create that connection authentically, first within ourselves and then with others.

Relationships are one of the most difficult areas for us homo sapiens to navigate, and they are the biggest source of our pleasure as well as our pain.  The past several years we have had an advanced course in them; I for one can say as difficult as it’s been, have learned some new and deeper versions of lessons I know will serve me well in the future, all of which culminated in a super-summer intensive, with this harvest season reaping the wisdom culled from that journey.

Some of those nuggets include: finding the balance between losing ourselves/being co-dependent versus isolating and becoming a monk (or a psychopath); having boundaries and not taking on/feeling responsible for another’s emotional or other type of well-being; nurturing yourself, no one can know exactly what you need but you; seeing people and relationships as they really are, not how you’d like them to be. And regarding those close/intimate relationships that are more difficult or challenging, keep in mind that that person – whether parent, boss, spouse, sibling, lover, friend, child – is just the actor playing a role in a scenario you have created in order to heal and grow.

Lastly, the people you choose to allow into your life – friends/boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/partner- should meet certain criteria. The word ‘friend’ especially has been so diluted and watered down with the use of Facebook and social media you need to be able to separate the wheat from the chaff and discern the Apples and Oranges. 

The foundation of a relationship with anyone deserving of your time and energy must include understanding, appreciation and respect. You should be able to check off at least two of these to be considered a friend, and if you are fortunate to have someone in your life who truly understands, appreciates and respects you, then you are very, very lucky and should treasure and honor that relationship for the special gem that it is.

The bottom line is, You Gotta Have Friends, and making time for friendships and your most important relationships is not a luxury but a necessity. It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to -day busyness of life, but we need to discipline ourselves to create space for connecting with the people who love and accept us, who know and understand us, with whom we share interests and history, and have grown together, not apart.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on October 2, 2012)

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This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

 Like us on Facebook    Follow us on Twitter   View our profile on LinkedIn  View on Instagram                 

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

If you are like me, my clients, family, friends and the rest of the world, you’ve been through some stuff the past six months (well more like the past two years, oh heck, since the Fall of 2008!) that has tested, stretched, stressed and made you confront some not-so-pleasant realities about yourself, your life and the people in it.

This meant lots of changes, whether forced upon you from the outside – i.e., having no choice but to move; getting laid off from your job; dealing with a divorce, breakup, or loss of a loved one – or internally, i.e., you were so sick of yourself or your situation that you had to do something, not the least of which was to change your perspective, or finally accept the reality of how things are, rather than how you imagined or wished them to be.

The more challenges you have and the more you resist, the worse things get. This has been a time of “go with the flow,” so whatever you’ve been through, know that it is exactly what you needed to make you stronger and get you to where you need to be next.

A lot of my work is about teaching you to trust yourself, have faith in the process and possess the patience to let life unfold as it should – even with those bumps in the road and unexpected twists and turns along the way. As long as you are intimate, honest and honoring with and of yourself while consistently being in action (which is sometimes non-action), whether internal or external, have confidence that things will shake out the way they are supposed to, in time and on time, in whatever form the Universe deems is best for you.

It all starts with knowing and owning who you are, where you’re at, what you truly want, and realizing you have the power to be the fullest, deepest expression of yourself if only you make it your responsibility and yours alone.  It means we have to grow up.

One of the tools I gave those ninth-graders last month – which I referred to it as a superpower- was to be grateful whenever things get a little rough. Like those magic words “Open Sesame!,” by simply focusing on something you can be thankful for, all of a sudden the pressure is lifted and a metaphorical door or window opens to let in a cool breeze, provide an answer to that riddle, or reveal a hidden treasure.

So no matter what you’ve been through recently, make sure you see the gift in the gristle, which is GROWTH.  Give it up with a great big letting go of the past, and exhale heartfelt gratitude for whatever life handed to you, having gotten through it, and embrace all the good you’ve gained and have yet to experience as a result.

Need to survey the lay of the land as the dust settles to sort out who’s who and what’s what? Give me a buzz and I’ll help you thank that unexpected messy house guest  who disrupted your home, but in the end left it better off than it was when he got there.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on May 14, 2014)

CLICK HERE FOR UPCOMING CLASSES

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This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

 Like us on Facebook    Follow us on Twitter   View our profile on LinkedIn  View on Instagram                 

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

Throughout the Halloween season we are bombarded with spooky images and haunted houses to remind us it’s that time of year to face our deepest fears. But the majority of things that frightens us isn’t conjured from external forces. Like the creepiness that comes from being in a house of mirrors, what usually freaks people out the most is seeing themselves multiplied a hundred times!

When in your own personal house of horrors, no matter how many cobwebs and shadows you find, know that we all have darker aspects of our personality, and we’re never confronted with anything we can’t handle, so we should never be afraid. Whether your fears and ugly parts are real or imagined, the key is not to run from them. The only thing to do is to shed light on the source of our anxieties and perceived inadequacies, get to their roots and make adjustments that will bring us closer to the most fulfilled and peaceful versions of ourselves.

And like the end of a scary movie, it comes down to you and only you to fight for your life.  There is no magic formula or genie in a bottle, no  Calgon or knight in shining armor to take you away. Taking responsibility for your life centers you in who you are and what you want – fantasy and illusion, or simply ignoring things, move you farther away. It’s up to you to create your own happiness and what you want in your life, and ask for help along the way.

So if you need to do a little exorcising of your inner ghouls and goblins, who ya gonna call?  Like Ghostbusters or those meddling kids in Scooby-Doo, I will expose and expel the real cause of your heebie-jeebies and things that go bump in the night so you can move forward and make the changes you need to be all of who you are in the bright light of day!

Today’s PGG was originally published on October 26, 2010)

CLICK HERE FOR UPCOMING CLASSES

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This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

 Like us on Facebook    Follow us on Twitter   View our profile on LinkedIn  View on Instagram                 

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

When the Universe speaks, I listen. Not in a burning-bush-on-a-mountain kind of way, but through some combination of random Facebook postings, TV shows/commercials, signs both literal and figurative and people, known and unknown.  Always repetitive.

In fact, most of the time I try to think as little as possible and instead pay very close attention to the world within and around me to get the answers/direction I need. I find that the best information we have often exists in this 3D experiential form more so than in the grey matter between our ears, and that there is much wisdom in receiving and perceiving what comes our way. (Plus it’s more fun and takes less effort to operate like this!)

Anyway, after the stock market crashed in 2008, “it” hinted to me in several ways that I should start some sort of group thing; when a third person, point blank raised his hand in my breakout session at an NYU symposium for laid-off financial professionals and asked “Can you put a group together?” I could no longer ignore the request. So exactly 5 years ago this month, Thursdays at Three  [now 8 1/2 years and is just evenings called Tuesday Talk] was born and has been going strong ever since – first weekly afternoons during the height of the recession, and then eventually bi-monthly with an evening session for folks who had found employment but asked to continue with coaching and support, and for others who wanted to make a career change or simply manage their work and life better.

It’s been quite the journey – and one of the most rewarding and important things I’ve done to grow both personally and professionally. It has made me a far better coach and facilitator, so thank you to all have participated, especially those four brave souls who ventured out and trusted me that first day! ( Click here for info about the next session)

As many of you know, my path has been a long and varied one. In January 2001 I founded a nonprofit organization called The Women’s Mosaic (TWM) after a lot of soul-searching and the result of a random workshop I picked from a Learning Annex catalog out of sheer desperation four months earlier. Among other things, that workshop was exactly what I needed to confirm and crystallize an idea that was floating around in my subconscious – 16 years,100 events, a coaching and speaking career later, the rest is history!

Of course when I told people how I started TWM, they all wanted to do the workshop, so we began offering it twice a year with amazing and profound results, attracting many repeat attendees with incredible stories throughout. Since 2012 they have been on indefinite hiatus and then sporadically offered since 2014 for various reasons. But, the past month, after various signs, in combo with not one, not two, but then a third person within a few weeks asking me when we were doing another I knew it was time – which means that many of you out there need this experience and it’s no coincidence that you are reading this right now!

I’ve already gone on too long in this PGG, so I will just let the video, invite and   blog posts speak for themselves as well as these participant descriptions:

“TWM’s Visioning Workshop is a great way to spark personal growth by getting in tune with your inner-most desires. By putting aside what you think you want for yourself, and, instead, going with your gut, it is amazing what you fill find! The Visioning Workshop came for me at a time when I was trying to decide where to go with my life, and I am so glad I did it. Throughout the workshop, I was forced to believe in what I was doing and trust myself completely, and since then I have been able to look back on my collage for more guidance, for which I am very grateful. I highly recommend the Visioning Workshop for anyone trying to answer the simplest or most complex questions for themselves.” Sally M.

When I was doing my collage I was thinking about my future and about my job search…and it actually happened. I got a job in a fashion industry where everybody smiles and are very happy with their lives – as it was on my collage!!!! …I cannot really believe that it actually worked for me so well and cannot wait to see what happens next!!! Thank you so much for this wonderful experience!” Joanna G.

“I think of the collage I created at the Visioning Workshop as a map of my unconscious mind. At the time of the workshop, I was in a transitional phase and in need of guidance. The collage helped me to gain a sense of calm and clarity. I especially enjoyed taking a break from the intellectual, thinking side of my brain and opening up the side that is more intuitive. The visual representations of my thoughts and ideas gave me a sense of peace that I could move forward with confidence. I look forward to doing another collage soon. Suzanne G.  

“Great!  The workshop helped me to clarify what success looks like to me.” Sheraun B

Are you one of those folks who are supposed to be there TOMORROW Saturday, October 21st?  You don’t need some shamanic ceremony or 80’s movie to help you decide.  Just listen to your Self, pay attention to the signs and heed the call to make some big changes in your life – this is simply a way to fast-track the process!

P.S. Yes, there are only women in the video, but men are most welcome to attend as well. You need some visioning, too!

(Today’s PGG was originally published on April 8, 2014)

CLICK HERE FOR UPCOMING CLASSES

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This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

 Like us on Facebook    Follow us on Twitter   View our profile on LinkedIn  View on Instagram                 

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

What’s going on? Whether socially or sensually, many have gotten’ it on to Marvin Gaye’s tunes, being enlightened and healed in a variety of ways as a result. You say you want a revolution? The Beatles told us it’s gonna be all right.  And the Rolling Stones declared we can’t always get what we want, but if we try sometimes, we get what we need.

The turmoil taking place both here and across the pond (oil spill, flooding, volcanic ash clouds, tornadoes, bankrupt governments, elections up in the air, stock market plunges, foiled terrorist plot, political protests and strikes [insert 2017 disasters and political chaos here…]) can put you a little on edge if you really consider all these upheavals happening simultaneously. If you are feeling directly affected or anxious about them, there are ways to keep you in the groove.

Think about what crisis is bubbling up or spinning out of control in your world – physically, emotionally or otherwise. Since we are all connected on one level or another, we can each create peace in our own piece of the pie. If we take responsibility to extinguish, learn from, and even prevent massive fires from burning up our individual lives, we’ll be doing our part to keep things as collectively calm as possible.

So if you find yourself in stormy seas, give me a buzz.  I’ll help you see what might be stirring things up and offer solutions to get you back on course.  Like Simon & Garfunkel, I can be that bridge over troubled water that will ease your mind…

(Today’s PGG was originally published on May 11, 2010)

CLICK HERE FOR UPCOMING CLASSES

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This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

 Like us on Facebook    Follow us on Twitter   View our profile on LinkedIn  View on Instagram                 

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

Don’t it always seem to go, that you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone.  ~ Joni Mitchell (via Janet Jackson)

I recently read that we have about 100 billion neurons in our brains, which also happens to be the approximate number of stars in the Milky Way, further illuminating my belief that “macrocosm and microcosm are mirrors of each other.” 

We are all experiencing some facet of the same reality, some piece of a greater whole (which is why so many of you wonder how I could know what’s going on in your life every week…!). Until we start to truly comprehend that concept, there can be no real progress and we kiss that bright shiny future goodbye.

At some point in our lives we have all suffered or have been witness to the loss of loved ones, a job, our health, money, minds, homes, pets, friends, freedom, security, dignity, identity and the list goes on.  And it seems like we’ve been losing more than ever over the past several years, doesn’t it?

When so many experience loss at the same time, it provides an opportunity to bond and elicits an empathy that might not normally be there. The challenge is to keep this awareness on a daily basis so we can honor each other and appreciate what we have when we have it, but at the same time be sure we don’t fall into a perpetual pity party or throw in the towel, because if we work at it and are patient enough and have the right perspective, Things Can Only Get Better

Loss also moves us to seek purpose and meaning and to recognize what is important in life, which is pretty much the same for everyone. The more of us who embrace that fact, the more we will desire and take responsibility for creating peace and understanding in our own worlds.     

Looking for a little more Kumbaya these days?  Give me a buzz and I’ll help you see that your glass is indeed half-full and there are silver linings all around you, channeling my practical Pollyanna to facilitate peace in your piece of the pie so that you always make the best of what you’ve got, way before it’s gone.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on September 13, 2011)

CLICK HERE FOR UPCOMING CLASSES

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

 Like us on Facebook    Follow us on Twitter   View our profile on LinkedIn  View on Instagram                 

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

Newton’s famous law states that a body at rest stays at rest and a body in motion will stay in motion until some external force acts upon it.  With our 24/7 always on, hyperconnected, overachieving, digital info-media world, most 21st century Americans live in a flow of perpetual momentum with no end in sight. Neither extreme is good, so to balance ourselves we must consciously and continually self-regulate and impose as a rejuvenating or preventative measure the act of stopping all activity from time to time. Yes, I said Stop. All. Activity.

I think pretty much all the time, about practical and bigger picture things, reflecting on the state of the world, my life, my work – analyzing, understanding, observing and being as aware as possible every waking moment, and of course I am not immune to the stresses that everyday life and being human entails.  This past weekend I “slept” for almost an entire day. But not due of lack of zzzz’s, or being sick, depressed or eating bad food, but simply because after everything I’ve been dealing with the past month or two, my mind, emotions and body needed me to temporarily shut down. I had nothing pressing going on, which the wisdom in my body knew and said to me, as it does every now and then, Time for a rest. 

Just like bears that hibernate each winter, we need to take a periodic pause – especially after or during a busy, challenging or stressful period – to let our bodies be still on all levels so we can reconnect, regroup and emerge refreshed and re-energized to our lives and the tasks at hand. That means (gasp!) disconnect from technology and interaction with other people, if possible, so as not to expend any physical, mental or emotional juice.

You can sleep or not sleep, but there should be no distractions or even sound if you can swing it. And no thinking, no reading, no writing. And no guilt.  Just luxuriate in the nothingness. Schedule and treat it as if it were a doctor’s appointment or trip to a resort spa – because it is that crucial to your physical and mental health. In other words,why not give your body and mind a break before they break down on you?

Our society promotes getting it all done all the time, which can take its toll when not interspersed with some serious downtime, which most folks only allow themselves when things have gotten so bad they are physically ill.  Keep in mind that even though you might be getting enough sleep and eating right and don’t have the flu, when you’re dealing with ongoing stress, you burn a different type of energy, which needs to be replenished with rest.  And resting is different from relaxing…but if you can’t rest, then relaxing is better than nothing!

Because I’m pretty good at daily maintenance, I am generally healthy and balanced (including a weekly 24-hour no-computer usage rule) so I know when it’s time to heed the call in order to nip anything else in the bud. (And hey, most of the news, entertainment, activity, tweets etc.you would be “missing” are non-essential, irrelevant and often nonsensical anyway – so really, let it go!)

Stress is inevitable, it’s how we manage it that counts, and rest plays a big part. Need help putting on the brakes? Give me a buzz and I can be the external force that gets the ball moving or the hand that stops you in your track, so you can get back on the right one…

(Today’s PGG was originally published on March 15, 2011)

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This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

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Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

As we watch with heartbreak and compassion the devastating aftermath of the earthquake in [Mexico], it’s a good time to reflect on (or react to) where that tectonic plate is in your life that needs to be released of its tension? Where do you need to prevent a tsunami or nuclear fallout from occurring, or recover from one that just did?

We all have areas of life that we tend to neglect more than others, allowing things to build up over time. Like Mother Nature’s need to release her pent-up pressure through a variety of earth – and weather-based events, our unbalanced energy has to go somewhere. And when not addressed it gets buried within us as fat or addictions, crushing debt, unhealthy relationships, dead-end jobs, physical or mental illness or a general malaise until one day the walls come a tumblin’ down – because if you don’t take care of it, the Universe eventually will.

As the saying goes, we often need to have a breakdown before we can have a breakthrough; it’s just life showing us where change is required. What emotions have been repressed that need to be released with a good cry or a sweaty workout? Is your mind about to crack (hopefully not like Charlie Sheen’s did, which on the surface appears entertaining but is no joking matter)? Is a relationship, career, job search or financial situation beyond repair or in need of a big ole tune-up? Is your body giving you a hard time?

Change is one thing that is certain in life, and it is most definitely in the air at the moment. Embracing it and going with the flow makes dealing with change easier and less stressful, so heed the wisdom from a certain 70’s hit TV series, when Peter was going through puberty and the Brady kids sang,very groovily I might add, “ When it’s time to change, then it’s time to change/ Don’t fight the tide, come along for the ride.” It means that “…you’ve got to re-arrange who you are into what you’re gonna be.” (Try getting that song out of your head now… Sha na na na na).

Change is always good if we respond to it in the right way- by accepting our state of affairs and our responsibility in its creation, and by facing the fears of what actions are necessary to confront it, all the while knowing that we will be better, stronger, and wiser for having done so.  And, we need to deal with the reality of the situation as it is, not as we would like it to be.

Not sure where the seismic activity or cresting river is in your life? Like Luke Skywalker or Jamiroquai, you can always Use the Force, or just give me a buzz and I’ll provide some rescue, relief and/or recovery to help you avoid a full-on meltdown and instead enjoy the ride!

(Today’s PGG was originally published on March 15, 2011)

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This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List
Like me on Facebook  Follow me on Twitter

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

I am not a teacher, but an awakener. ~ Robert Frost

The dream begins, most of the time, with a teacher who believes in you, who tugs and pushes and leads you on to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a sharp stick called truth . ~ Dan Rather

Better than a thousand days of diligent study is one day with a great teacher. ~ Japanese proverb

It’s that time of year when notebooks and knapsacks abound and all sorts of new beginnings and nerves are in the air, bringing the possibilities and excitement that arrive with the start of an academic year. Whether or not we find ourselves in an actual classroom this Fall, we are all students in this school called Life, which means that anyone and any situation can be our teacher, and education can come in all shapes and forms.

It is often those who are closest to us who teach us the exact lessons we never knew we needed (or wanted) to learn – either directly, like my six year old niece, who in her own words very calmly told my brother she wished he hadn’t found the prescription sunglasses he lost for the umpteenth time because he needed to learn to pay better attention to his personal possessions and the harsher consequences of their non-recovery; or indirectly, like a co-worker, friend or family member who likes to talk a lot forces you to be a better listener, have more patience and/or set boundaries.

And whatever “class” you are in, sometimes you must first fail miserably in order to then pass with flying colors, because you can’t learn anything without making a few mistakes, a little trial and error to perfect that which we need to master…. Hopefully you can figure out that the experience itself was the teacher, or have someone around to help glean what you need to learn and grow as a result. The good news is that you will never repeat a class when you’ve truly learned a lesson the hard way, and if you’re lucky, sometimes you can even have a teacher who helps you skip several grades.

Whether you think like Pink Floyd or feel like Lauryn Hill, learning is a lifelong process and everything serves its purpose in the bigger picture for you to graduate at the end of your life with honors.

So this September, be grateful for all those amazing teachers you’ve had both inside the classroom and out. Thank the role models, mentors and instructors who serve as great examples of achievement and inspiration as well as the challenging bosses, employees and clients, the bullies and mean girls, the tough coach, your current or ex-boy/girlfriend/partner/spouse, your pain in the neck big or little brother/sister, anyone who gave you a hard time, and especially those difficult “tests” you endured because they too helped form your character and are all opportunities to make you a better you.

Need to repeat (or stop repeating) a few classes or get a little tutoring to bring you closer to the grade you deserve? Give me a buzz and I’ll be sure you get a gold star or A+ on that project, because you can make your life much closer to a 4.0 than you could ever imagine!

(Today’s PGG was originally published on September 6, 2011)

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

This past June 2017  I had someone film parts of my New Attitude Summer School series (see info below), which resulted in this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)

In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life,  maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.   Enjoy & Stay Tuned for Fall Classes!

Click here to watch video

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over forty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List
Like me on Facebook  Follow me on Twitter

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself 

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