The past few weeks have been ugly.
Tragic and senseless death and destruction both here and abroad feel like yet another punch in the stomach. We’ve been trying to find some solid ground to get our breathing back to normal after the wind has been knocked out of us repeatedly, as we react with shock and dismay to countless horror stories and history repeating itself streaming at us from every which way.
If, like me, you are a sensitive person, you found that your equilibrium has been a little off, that there has been a disturbance in the Force, a cosmic warp in the Universe that came with a collective sigh, utter frustration and profound sadness on many levels, for a variety of reasons.
That’s the bad news.
The last few weeks have also brought us some of the most gorgeous summer weather the East Coast has had in years, and we’ve seen a multitude of people pouring buckets of ice water over their heads for a good cause – mostly to make us laugh – simultaneously counteracting all the less than humorous happenings. And in my own sphere, I have been fortunate to visit some picture perfect places, re-connect with old friends, made progress on several longtime goals and have celebrated tremendous transformation in my clients, which makes me love what I do even more and gives me a deep sense of satisfaction and joy like no other.
That’s the sort-of-good news. Because these days it seems that ugly is the status quo. We are bombarded with so many negative events, factual and fictional – both served up as entertainment- that we have simply become used to it. In these days of doom and gloom I encourage you all to imagine the opposite: What if Beauty became the norm?
And when I talk about Beauty, I don’t mean a two-dimensional feast for the eyes, or pleasure for pleasure’s sake, although that is part of it. True beauty is three dimensional, it is something to be FELT and EXPERIENCED, not just superficially appreciated. Beauty happens inside AND out. It is never just cosmetic. It is something to be absorbed by every fiber of your being, whether admiring a work of art, listening to music, observing Nature in its magnificent glory, witnessing an act of courage or compassion or enjoying a person’s human expression at its best.
SO, where do we begin, how do we do this? It’s tempting to just tune out and distract ourselves with whatever we can, and hope that the problems of the world instantly vanish or some drug company creates a pill for peace. But the truth is that the more disconnected and desensitized we become, the more problems we will have. Most people are walking around emotionally constipated. We need to keep our senses alive, in tact, ebbing and flowing in a balanced way, yet not letting them run the show or allowing any external images or situations grab control of us. We need to be able to respond from the deepest human level so we can know how to react; when to take action, when to pick up the phone, when to tweet or post something, when to set boundaries or ask for help, and when to turn the TV or computer off.
Brene Brown, in her now famous Ted Talk on vulnerablity, tells us that when we numb the bad, we numb the good too. So you can’t just shut yourself off if you want to feel love, compassion, empathy, kindness, and yes even feel beauty. Feeling means we are alive. If not, then what are we?
Duality is a fact of life: in order to appreciate the sunshine, you need the rain. Once you are able to connect with and feel ALL of what is going on within you, with a little regular detox of laughter and tears, you can deal with the not so pleasant emotions as they come up and let go of them more easily, and conversely take hold of and relish in the positive, ecstatic and joyous ones even longer, expanding and benefiting from that energy more profoundly.
Look for Beauty everywhere and let in the Beauty to overpower the beast. Allow the darkness, anger, pain and shame to move through you so that you can then use that same vehicle to embody and express supreme joy and love when it abounds. We can then more accurately observe and call out injustice because you know in your heart what truth, justice, goodness and beauty looks and feels like.
Not quite sure how to go from Blah to Bliss? Give me a buzz, and I’ll show you how living life as a fully-fledged member of the human race has its rewards, and being able to FEEL TRUTH, FREEDOM, BEAUTY & LOVE are by far the best.
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