Patience is not passive; on the contrary, it is active; it is concentrated strength. ~ Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton

Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. ~ Jean-Jacques Rousseau

I find it curious that the word patient has two distinct meanings, yet both encompass bearing some level of discomfort over a period of time (even if it’s just being in the waiting room of a doctor’s office!).

We all have individual and collective anniversaries, memories and milestones that we share to some degree or another; regardless if they were positive or negative, hopefully you are able to see the growth and healing that has since transpired. Tomorrow will mark three months to the day [Sept. 2012] my mom underwent open-heart surgery, and after minute-by-minute, hour-by-hour, day-by-day, week-by-week attention, care and rest, she was back out at her clubs (yes plural, and yes, as in nightclubs/dancing) this past weekend.

It’s truly amazing what time can do when you give it a chance to work its magic. But in this action-oriented, left -brained, results-demanding, pill -for-everything, instant-information, fast-food society, time gets a bad rap. Faster is perceived to always be better and action trumps rest in the eyes of others. With almost everything available to us on demand and bottles of 5-hour energy at our disposal, we’ve grown impatient beyond reasonable expectations.

“Patience is a virtue” and “Time heals all wounds” are two of my favorite adages because they express the type of ‘muscles” I’ve exercised and “tools” I’ve developed — you guessed it, over time — as they become realities when you see the proof in the pudding. In my coaching and speaking work, I am constantly trying to get folks to understand that although we are living in a 24/7 instant access technological wonderland, Nature does not work that way — the acorn does not become an oak tree overnight!

Clients are often frustrated with me when I advise them not to do anything that they consider as “doing” or will have a direct and immediate impact on their job search or life’s path. What I suggest doesn’t mean they should sit around twiddling their thumbs; it’s about understanding that there is a process, and it’s inner work through activities that don’t seem “productive” or results-producing, when in fact they are the true heavy lifting of personal growth. We all have wounds that need to be healed, and not addressing them or allowing them the time and space to do so is often what blocks us from moving forward; therefore, that is where time and energy needs to be spent.

I am always planting seeds when I work with clients, giving them ideas and suggestions they may not necessarily be ready to implement immediately, but should think about, pay attention to and consider down the road. I also guide them towards the many stepping stones they need to take on the path to their ultimate goal, whether or not they are aware of that goal.

The philosopher Kierkegaard said, “Patience is necessary, and one cannot reap immediately where one has sown.” I have had the pleasure of finding out recently how many of my clients are beginning to reap what they have sown, with projects, jobs and opportunities that are only now coming to fruition, one, two and even four years after we met, which is extremely rewarding and only reinforces the “method to my madness.”

The paradox and balancing trick, of course, is that time doesn’t stop; it can pass us by quickly, so we need to be in motion with it and “make hay while the sun shines.” But on the other hand, we need to accept and be comfortable with what is realistic in terms of how long things take to change and develop. Just like we are all students in this school called Life, we are all patients in the healing of our lives which is part of what growing means — healing the wounds of our past so we can move forward ever more healthy and strong.

Need a little help on your journey from acorn to oak tree, or from wounded to well? Give me a buzz and I’ll take a look to see how you can use the gift of time to speed things up or slow them down, keeping in mind, that might just be the opposite of what you think…

(Today’s PGG was originally published on September 11, 2012.)

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Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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One of my favorite movies, Bottle Shock, is about the then-nascent California wine industry and its victory over the French in a blind taste test celebrating the 1976 bicentennial. The film is based on the true story of a man who ditched his legal career to pursue a dream of making the best wine possible. Jim Barrett put his life into Chateau Montelena; to do so was a huge risk, and he had to have unwavering faith in himself and trust in the process of such a delicate, complex and time-consuming task, whose results were not necessarily guaranteed.

As with any such journey, there were many twist and turns and ups and downs along the way, but in the end he triumphed not only because he beat the French at their proudest export, but also because in doing so, blew the field wide open for quality wine to be produced in countries around the globe, and the world has never been the same.

Orson Welles, in his famous commercials would say, “We will sell no wine before its time.” It takes time for lasting success to develop, and there is no better activity than viticulture to demonstrate that. There are cycles of planting, pruning, harvesting, fermenting and numerous other magical, alchemical things that need to happen for that perfect glass to arrive at your table. As I always say in my seminars, “Remember that grapes do not turn into wine overnight!”

With the start of every Spring, Summer, Winter and Fall, we are reminded that to Every Thing There is a Season. The historic vote to legalize same-sex marriage in NY three days [after the solstice of June 2011] was decades in the making; several societal changes and generations of progress had to occur in order to have the majority of the population now be “ripe” for its acceptance, and we are all stronger and better for having gone through the process.

Since we are just about a quarter through the year, be sure you check in and are working internally and externally towards whatever goals you set for yourself; know that as long as you consistently do things that you love and care about, you are fertilizing your life, making it as rich as possible. Focus your thoughts, words and deeds in the direction you want to be going, knowing that all will come to fruition with a perfect union of patience, persistence and perseverance – in time and on time.

You can’t put the cart before the horse, so if you’re feeling a little frustrated and impatient in pursuit of your passions, give me a buzz and I’ll be a future sommelier explaining the uniqueness and quality of your vintage, or the judge that casts the deciding vote to make your dream a reality!

(Today’s PGG was originally published on June 28, 2011.)

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Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

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Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

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Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Newton’s famous law states that a body at rest stays at rest and a body in motion will stay in motion until some external force acts upon it. With our 24/7 always on, hyper-connected, overachieving, digital info-media world, most 21st century Americans live in a flow of perpetual momentum with no end in sight. Neither extreme is good, so to balance ourselves we must consciously and continually self-regulate and impose as a rejuvenating or preventative measure the act of stopping all activity from time to time. Yes, I said Stop. All. Activity.

I think pretty much all the time, about practical and bigger picture things, reflecting on the state of the world, my life, my work — analyzing, understanding, observing and being as aware as possible every waking moment, and of course I am not immune to the stresses that everyday life and being human entails. This past weekend I “slept” for almost an entire day. But not due of lack of zzzz’s, or being sick, depressed or eating bad food, but simply because after everything I’ve been dealing with the past month or two, my mind, emotions and body needed me to temporarily shut down. I had nothing pressing going on, which the wisdom in my body knew and said to me, as it does every now and then, Time for a rest.

Just like bears that hibernate each winter, we need to take a periodic pause — especially after or during a busy, challenging or stressful period — to let our bodies be still on all levels so we can reconnect, regroup and emerge refreshed and re-energized to our lives and the tasks at hand. That means (gasp!) disconnect from technology and interaction with other people, if possible, so as not to expend any physical, mental or emotional juice.

You can sleep or not sleep, but there should be no distractions or even sound if you can swing it. And no thinking, no reading, no writing. And no guilt. Just luxuriate in the nothingness. Schedule and treat it as if it were a doctor’s appointment or trip to a resort spa — because it is that crucial to your physical and mental health. In other words, why not give your body and mind a break before they break down on you?

Our society promotes getting it all done all the time, which can take its toll when not interspersed with some serious downtime, which most folks only allow themselves when things have gotten so bad they are physically ill. Keep in mind that even though you might be getting enough sleep and eating right and don’t have the flu, when you’re dealing with ongoing stress, you burn a different type of energy, which needs to be replenished with rest. And resting is different from relaxing…but if you can’t rest, then relaxing is better than nothing!

Because I’m pretty good at daily maintenance, I am generally healthy and balanced (including a weekly 24-hour no-computer usage rule) so I know when it’s time to heed the call in order to nip anything else in the bud. (And hey, most of the news, entertainment, activity, tweets etc.you would be “missing” are non-essential, irrelevant and often nonsensical anyway — so really, let it go!)

Stress is inevitable, it’s how we manage it that counts, and rest plays a big part. Need help putting on the brakes? Give me a buzz and I can be the external force that gets the ball moving or the hand that stops you in your track, so you can get back on the right one…

(Today’s PGG was originally published on February 20, 2013.)

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Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

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If a human being dreams a great dream, or dares to love someone…If a human being dares to be bigger than the condition into which he or she was born, it means so can you… I am a human being, nothing human can be alien to me. ~ Maya Angelou

And what a human she was! Dr. Maya Angelou possessed and cultivated a creative and brilliant mind, a powerful and compassionate heart, a flair for the dramatic, a serious sense of humor, and a thorough appetite for all aspects of life. She was a phenomenal woman who spent every breath of her 86 years consciously striving to express the fullest embodiment of what it means to exist as a spiritual being in this physical world.

To me, this is her greatest legacy. Like my other six foot tall heroine Eleanor Roosevelt, she walked her talk, and therefore we all benefited. She served as an example for all she stood for and knew to be Universally true; she espoused the unity and dignity of people of every race and creed, recognizing that “we are more alike than we are unalike.”

And she was very aware that she was indeed human, and knew how dangerous it is to make people, like a Martin Luther King Jr., Gandhi, or Mother Teresa larger than life — they were all human beings and when we idolize or put them on a pedestal they become inaccessible and we think we can never be like them. Instead they should inspire us to be extraordinary in our own way.

In our youth-obsessed and advertising-driven culture, it is unfortunate that we give so little airtime to our elders like Dr. Angelou, Nelson Mandela or Grace Lee Boggs, because when we listen to the wisdom that nearly nine decades of being a person who has chosen to love, forgive, learn and grow, who allowed themselves to reflect, observe and evolve, they teach us how to live. They are lighthouses that remind us who we really are and where we should be going — and these days especially when one is extinguished it feels like an even bigger loss because they are rare gems and we wonder who is coming up the rear to replace them.

In my work I have the honor and privilege of helping you discover that no matter how old you are or where you are from, you have a unique way of leaving our planet a little better off than when you arrived — even if it is simply by virtue of your own healed life.

Some of my clients, as a result of our meeting, have already gone on as a result of our meeting to win Tonys and Fulbrights, or are on their way to becoming a media moguls, best-selling authors, cutting edge inventors, or warriors for justice; whether they have an Ivy League background, were formerly incarcerated or are a ninth-grade NYC public school student, every one of them has something to offer, an opportunity to improve their own world, a way to be the most human they can be.

Not quite convinced that you, too, can be a giant among us? Give me a buzz and I’ll show you how like those Redwoods of California, you are one of hundreds of special trees that make up a forest of awe-inspiring majesty and beauty, living in harmony with one another and Earth, and the very Nature of Life itself.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on June 4, 2014.)

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Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

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Tell me what’s wrong with having a little faith in what you’re feelin’ in your heart.  ~ The Dixie Chicks (via Patty Griffin)

I try not to think as much as possible. This serves me well for many reasons. First of all, I am somewhat dyslexic, so the more I stay out of my head, the clearer things are for me. And forget about speaking; whenever I do my seminars what I say has to come from my heart and gut, otherwise I would get super-confused and choke from stage fright and the fear of sounding stupid. I have learned to operate this way more and more; it reduces stress by keeping me connected to myself and in the flow of life, in harmony with who I am and what I need or want at any given moment. It is the best motivational, decision-making and communications tool I possess, because I have harnessed and developed it as such.

In the movie Jerry Maguire, Tom Cruise confronts Cuba Gooding, Jr. about why he has not yet been offered a $10 million dollar contract, citing that the way he is off the field is how he needs to be on the field. “You play with your head, not your heart. in your personal life? Heart….Play the game, play it from your heart and you know what, I will show you the kwan. That’s the truth man, can you handle it?” Jerry knew that if Rod did what he loved with love, then, and only then, would he be able to show him the money.

And that doesn’t just hold true in the movies. Steve Tisch, a proud owner of the NY Giants, declared that the key to their big victory this past weekend was that they ” …played with more heart, more passion, and more love for each other and for the game of football.” Does that negate, replace, or even diminish all the hard work, training, strategy, talent and skill necessary to achieve such great heights? No, of course not. But it’s the thing that will make the difference between a good team and a great team, a good life and a great one.

Most of us are taught to live by our heads, logic and ego, not by our hearts and guts. But only when we listen to our hearts and put love into everything are we our most authentic selves, which means living our truth. And when we are living our truth, we can then more easily speak our truth, and stand in our truth. And that is the best way to guarantee peace and prosperity in our lives, no matter what the circumstances.

Million dollar contract, Lombardi Trophy or not, we are all players the Super Bowl of Life – so are you playing with your head or your heart? Give me a buzz and I’ll make sure that unlike Tom Cruise in his confrontation with Jack Nicholson, you can indeed handle the truth and start living in alignment with who you are and what you want to make happen both on the field and off!

(Today’s PGG was originally published on February 7, 2012.)

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Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final ten minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!   Click on above links for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Read over fifty 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

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