Archives for posts with tag: self awareness

There is a deeper world than this

That you don’t understand

There is a deeper world than this

Tugging at your hand

~ Sting, Love is the Seventh Wave

Besides what we hear about the 1% and the increasing disparity between the rich and poor, there is a growing epidemic of another kind of poverty that has nothing to do with the amount of money in a bank account: a lack of connection to ourselves, each other, the world around us, and something greater that holds it all together.

I’ve been noticing a trend in my clients lately, many considered millennials or “digital natives” (essentially those who have never lived during a time without PCs, texting and social media), who are rife with angst and a level of discontent and self-doubt usually reserved for those in the midst of a midlife crisis, empty-nest syndrome, or more dire circumstances.

And it’s not just young people who are dealing with this; it simply shows up in a more pronounced way. On the surface they seem to have everything going for them — they are highly educated and have decent first or second jobs, they have good health and no major responsibilities like kids or a mortgage — but somehow they feel they haven’t achieved enough, they are bored or are missing something but can’t quite put their finger on it. In older folks it comes through as unspecified anxiety, career or relationship frustration, mental scatteredness or erratic communication, an inability to sit still or relax deeply, or a feeling of “Is this all there is?” when thinking about the rest of their life.

And no matter what your age, because of our now 24/7 and 360 degree digital lifestyle, there is severe FMO and a (mostly) subconscious habit of comparing ourselves to each other that is self-sabotaging, making us feel “less than” or deficient in some way — whether it’s about the hot boyfriend/girlfriend/partner/spouse you’ll never attract, the dream job that alluded you, the baby you do or don’t yet have, the great vacations you can’t afford, all the amazing friends you never hang out with or “like” your Facebook posts or Instagram photos … etc. You get the #nofilter picture.

Underneath it all seems to be a deep-seated fear of the unknown and feeling of powerlessness over our lives and a world that is rapidly transforming before our eyes in ways that are not always positive or hopeful. The worry and rudderlessness is often magnified by social media and all else that is vying for our attention, time and energy.

Does any of the above sound like you? If so, take a moment to do a reality check. My guess is that you likely have what I am now dubbing “life dysmorphia” — meaning your sense of your life and how “bad” you presume it to be is either highly distorted or simply not true, and the reasons you are unhappy or stuck are not what you might think.

As in my coaching sessions, seminars and previous PGGs, my solution for this is always to GO DEEP, as technology keeps us on superficial ground. Detach from the virtual world and plunge into the depths of your own thoughts, feelings, relationships and the mysteries of the Universe.

Whether you are 25, 65 or somewhere in between — and I have worked with all ages — the antidote to this unsettled, dissatisfied existential state is to be SELF-centered in a foundation of worthiness and value; find purpose and meaning in your work; express yourself creatively; demonstrate faith and trust in yourself, the process and the Universe; and be open to giving and receiving LOVE. And stay in your own lane.

Most important, as I say in nearly all of my talks and to my clients: Get out of your head and into your body — which means operating from your gut and heart — and be grounded in who you are.

It’s about staying present and standing where your feet are at. It’s about having conversations IRL. It’s about being congenial, forming community and raising consciousness. It’s about taking the time to spend with actual people; to commune with yourself, others and the world around you. To feel alive in flesh and blood, not just in our minds projected and framed into an online existence. It’s about creating instead of consuming. It’s about remembering we are humans, not robots or avatars in a fantasy version of reality.

And cultivate relationships. Relationships to every kind of person, family or stranger, friend or lover, store clerk or sibling, and whatever you want to call that force greater than ourselves. When you go deeper into yourself and can truly relax and be present, you free up more internal space for love to flow between you and yourself or any of the people in your life, and yes, even those you just met, because we are all part of the same brother/sister/gender-neutral ‘hood.

I’m a big hugger (see the PGG Six Seconds). I often hug people I don’t have a lot history with or even know well or at all, but if there is that spark of connection or some wavelength I click with, dig or admire in another, because I am “primed,” it allows positive energy to be exchanged through an embrace. That is real, and much, much more powerful and nourishing than a “like” on FB. Also, when the internal pipes are blocked or lie dormant, not only can your love not flow, but your creativity can’t be expressed, which is another surefire way to feel disconnected from your own vitality. So don’t be afraid to open the floodgates!

Not sure how to become less Fragile in these disorienting times? Before you send an SOS to the world, give me a buzz and I will help tear down that Fortress Around Your Heart so you can Send Your Love to yourself and others. As humans, that’s the best way We’ll Be Together, and you’ll be doing your part in creating a Brand New Day for us all!

Today’s PGG was originally posted on August 11, 2017

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Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

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Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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We don’t want to hear about the process because we want everything to be instantaneous. Process in life always comes before the promotion. ~ T.D. Jakes

Now so much I know that things just don’t grow if you don’t bless them with your patience. ~ ‘Emmylou’ by First Aid Kit

As a professional coach for over [14] years now, I find this a major theme that comes up over and over with most everyone I work with. Everybody wants answers and results overnight; they want action steps and bullet points to go from A to B to C. And they get very frustrated when I tell them it doesn’t work like that!

But if they listen, do the ‘homework’ and begin to understand and internalize what I have to say, it is inevitable that they will get answers, rediscover and connect to themselves, see light at the end of the tunnel, feel an inner shift, gain a new perspective, land their dream job, increase their self-esteem, are more integrated and fulfilled than they could have ever imagined. And more times than not, at the end of the day, month, year(s), I get a begrudging….”You were right!”

For any lasting growth and change to occur you have to embrace the three Ps — process, patience, and persistence. Depending what you are working on, you could see or feel results after one session, six weeks, six months, or three years; some shifts are big and external, but most are subtle and more internal because they are still ‘cooking’ so to speak. Remember we are always evolving, and the acorn does not become the oak tree overnight!

Certain times of the year inspire more focus on change than others, whether organic or collectively agreed upon with, say, a Western calendar….The change of seasons and turning back of the clock is one of the many shifts we are now working with.

So no matter what time of year, before you go galloping into the future all willy-nilly, be sure you are implementing the changes that you truly desire and are going in the best direction at this time in your life, or perhaps make a course correction.

Either way, you want to harness that energy to make the most of the months ahead and if you need some help, give me a buzz*I’ll be the Horse Whisperer that will guide you to the clarity, balance and direction you need in any area of your life to make it the best it can be!

Today’s PGG was originally posted on January 28, 2014

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance. ~ Alan Watts

Just keep in mind: The more we value things outside our control, the less control we have. ~ Epictetus

In June of 2012 my mother had open heart surgery. After the ordeal, the only thing she kept saying she wanted, and her ultimate goal, was to “get back to the way things were before.” But when something that major happens to your physical body — literally cracking open your rib cage to access the main organ that keeps you alive, replacing a valve and rewiring some blood vessels — things cannot, and should not, go back to being the “same.” It’s impossible. First of all, as a lifesaving measure, your body should be functioning much better, which for her, initially it was.

However, because my mother was unwilling to integrate the larger message of healing, she clung too hard to her old ways, with no real lifestyle changes, mental rewiring or emotional processing. Three years later, almost exactly to the day of her operation, she succumbed to a different disease, compounded and/or induced by stress, and is no longer with us on this planet.

I share this as an analogy of where we are right now as a country, society, and world at large. No matter how we got here, this is our open-heart-surgery moment. We have, perhaps, the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to transform ourselves both individually and collectively in order to be more optimally attuned and functioning better.

I realize that all might sound a bit dramatic, but I do believe this is the time we are in, even if we are only getting glimpses of the road ahead. As a species we have been out of balance and alignment in many areas of life, so whether this crisis is a natural occurrence we need to respond to urgently, or a manufactured one used to manipulate, oppress or profit off us, there can be no doubt it’s a wake-up call — a dismantling that on some level we needed and perhaps even subconsciously asked for to make us stronger from the inside out. It’s that big. And no one is exempt.

Now I never said this would be easy.

We are barely out of the “shock and awe” stage of this war/marathon, and you might not even totally grasp what is happening or what is yet to come. You may not fully realize that the life you had is in the process of transforming, which by its very nature means something must die in order to be reborn. And as author and lecturer Gregg Braden reminds us, there are five stages of grief we go through, some of them simultaneously. Which do you currently find yourself in: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression or Acceptance?

Because we don’t yet know the specifics, and there is still so much unknown of how this will all shake out, our mind/egos can start wreaking havoc and wanting to rebel against the lack of certainty in myriad ways. The good news is the one thing you can subdue your anxiety with is the knowledge that every challenge provides an opportunity. Every cloud has a silver lining. Destruction makes way for reconstruction. Something positive always comes out of something negative. As one door closes, another one opens. Something lost, something gained. And, as the old saying goes, “You are never given more than you can handle.”

When the dust settles from this demolition of the reality you once knew, you can start to think about how to restructure your life, your health, your work, your interpersonal relations, and your relationship to both inner and outer authority. You will start to understand more profoundly what you do and do not value, then act accordingly.

By now you’ve probably gotten a taste of what this new reality looks like for you — at least in the near future — with whom you’ll be experiencing it and how. For months now I’ve said to friends (half) jokingly, that I’ve been living in a hermitage, more self-isolated than usual due to some deep personal changes I have been going through. So now I can say to all of you, “Welcome to my world!”

I realize not everyone will have as easy as a transition with this pandemic-induced lifestyle change, i.e., especially if you are partnered, with kids, and now all working and schooling from home. Or if you have problematic roommates and family members with whom your interaction until now has remained minimal. Or if you usually use your abode only as a storage closet and place to rest your head at night because it leaves much to be desired …

Just as addicts need rehab, prisoners get house arrest/prison/solitary, and spiritual seekers and others need periodic retreats, remember those sites act as a container for transformation — made easier with some level of acceptance — whether they’ve come to that situation voluntarily or not. Ultimately, we must find the meaning and experience the feeling of being at home within ourselves, regardless of our environment.

For now, notice that this slowing down and containment forces us to focus on the quality, not the quantity of what we do and how we use our time, and with whom we spend (or don’t spend) it. What is the quality of the food you eat, the quality of the thoughts you think, the quality of the information you are consuming, the air that you breathe, the moments that you have? What about the quality of your communication and relationships? You now have time to do that journaling and think about who you are and what you are doing with your life. Who do you want to be and what do you want to do in a post-corona world? How can you build a quality inner foundation for yourself?

In my lectures, I always talk about how we need to take responsibility for our lives, our own happiness, no matter what the outer circumstances may be. Because it’s those very circumstances that we cannot control; but what we can control is our response. We have the ability to respond. The outcome in any situation, and the relative suffering we may or may not experience, is based on our response. So what will yours be today?

Not quite sure how to make this quarantine one of quality, not quantity? Give me a buzz and I’ll help you see the value of working on your inner Home Sweet Home so that you can build a palace worthy of your own glorious personal crown, not a corona of virus that keeps you down!

Please note: I realize there is part of the population who will be working harder than ever outside the home on the front lines; others will have extreme financial hardship and/or are stranded abroad. I want to acknowledge and profoundly thank those essential folks for your hard work and service, express empathy for those most severely economically and physically affected, and encourage you to trust there is a silver lining and much growth to be had for you as well at this time, it just might have a different “container” than I referred to above …

Today’s PGG was originally posted on March 20, 2020

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

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All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

Throughout the Halloween season we are bombarded with spooky images and haunted houses to remind us it’s that time of year to face our deepest fears. But the majority of things that frightens us isn’t conjured from external forces. Like the creepiness that comes from being in a house of mirrors, what usually freaks people out the most is seeing themselves multiplied a hundred times!

When in your own personal house of horrors, no matter how many cobwebs and shadows you find, know that we all have darker aspects of our personality, and we’re never confronted with anything we can’t handle, so we should never be afraid. Whether your fears and ugly parts are real or imagined, the key is not to run from them. The only thing to do is to shed light on the source of our anxieties and perceived inadequacies, get to their roots and make adjustments that will bring us closer to the most fulfilled and peaceful versions of ourselves.

And like the end of a scary movie, it comes down to you and only you to fight for your life. There is no magic formula or genie in a bottle, no Calgon or knight in shining armor to take you away. Taking responsibility for your life centers you in who you are and what you want — fantasy and illusion, or simply ignoring things, move you farther away. It’s up to you to create your own happiness and what you want in your life, and ask for help along the way.

So if you need to do a little exorcising of your inner ghouls and goblins, who ya gonna call? Like Ghostbusters or those meddling kids in Scooby-Doo, give me a call and I will expose and expel the real cause of your heebie-jeebies and things that go bump in the night so you can move forward and make the changes you need to be all of who you are in the bright light of day!

Today’s PGG was originally posted on October 26, 2010

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

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Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

A human mind is a wandering mind, and a wandering mind is an unhappy mind,” was the conclusion of a Harvard study whose research was conducted using an iPhone app. It is a sentiment that many religions and philosophies have proclaimed for centuries and can best be summed up by the popular phrase “Be here now.”

If researchers had a window into our minds, they’d see that we are almost never fully engaged in what is right in front of us, whether we’re thinking about the past or future, or simply not focused on the task at hand — and that causes unhappiness.

According to Andrew Bernstein’s book The Myth of Stress, it’s not the activity or situation that is the stressor, it’s our mind’s perception and reaction to the situation that causes the stress. By recognizing the reality of a circumstance and truly comprehending why it is happening, you can greatly reduce your adverse response to whatever is taking place.

I am always talking about process and “understanding where you’re at.” Most unpleasant situations you find yourself in are impermanent; by simply accepting that they are temporary, you can greatly increase your sense of inner peace and balance. Because life is constantly in motion you need to learn how to “go with the flow” and knowing that “this too shall pass.”

Remember that if you show up mentally, as well as physically, to that meeting, event or conversation, you’ve already done half the work, and the Universe can meet you halfway to create whatever it is you want or need.

Out of chaos always comes clarity. Need a little help living happily in the unknown and keepin’ it in real time? Give me a buzz; I can be a human app that checks in to show you how to make sense of and make the best out of any situation you find your present self.

Today’s PGG was originally posted on November 16, 2010

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

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Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

It has always bothered me that most New Year’s resolutions seem to revolve around losing weight and getting in shape. Gyms especially bank on this, with classes and machines overflowing those first two weeks in January, only to slim down to those who have been going all along. The attrition is a perfect example of not heeding our internal ebb and flow, not to mention Spring being a much more natural time to make such changes. So don’t feel bad if this describes you!

Instead, why not think about detoxing and tuning up your mental and emotional diets, adjusting your atmosphere and exercising a more positive attitude toward yourself and others?

In 1981, the advent of something called Music Television (yes kids, that was MTV in the olden days) meant that Video Killed the Radio Star. Although the sentiment initially applied to the music industry, it has evolved to include our 24/7, multi-device-always-on entertainment/info news cycle, and delivery of much nonsense and nuttiness through a gazillion distribution channels both online and off. The combination of media and technology is a powerful force that can either enhance or erode our humanity, but with the direction we’re going in, it seems like video has killed our sanity.

In a way, we’ve always been our own little radio towers with what we think and feel, but now we are literally transmitting these thoughts and feelings in a more tangible way with our gadgets and gizmos. What are you receiving and what are you broadcasting? How is it impacting your state of mind and mood?

What do you tune in to on a daily basis? Which intoxicating sights, sounds and stories infiltrate your being: cat videos, pundits, housewives, serial murders, frenemies? I admit I enjoy a little Mickey D’s now and then, but like Morgan Spurlock, remember what happens to you when you ingest that all day, every day. If we are what we eat (and we are), then we are what we read, watch and listen to as well. In the smorgasbord of programming out there, the pickings are slim when it comes to nutrition. Whether TV or social media, strive for the majority of your consumption to be thoughtful, uplifting, educational and/or informative, and know that good comedy is actually medicine.

(P.S. I hear there are some quality series that exist — but it’s curious we’ve coined the term to “binge-watch” say, Game of Thrones or Breaking Bad. What does that do to your sensory digestive system? What kind of hangover would you have from that? How could you have used your time and energy in a more productive way? When you are cranky the next day, is it due to your emotions or Walter White’s?)

I am not anti-TV/media/technology. I say all things in moderation. The trick is to become conscious and not be spoon-fed whatever the suits and advertisers want us to eat! Try a TV fast and realize you’re not missing all that much. You’ll have time to sleep more, learn to cook or finally begin to meditate. It’s up to us to control our technology and not allow our technology to control us.

So if you’re dragging in the morning, think about what you watched on your screen the night before. If you can’t get any work done or fall asleep, how many hours did you allow yourself to be led astray via random Facebook or Twitter feeds? And what is it that you are creating or contributing with your Wi-Fi and widgets?

In an increasingly desensitized and distracted world, with so many folks feeling stuck, confused and frustrated in their career and life, and with so many searching for purpose and meaning, wanting to enjoy better health and relationships in their lives, we must constantly pull out the weeds of static in and around our thoughts and emotions in order to operate at a higher frequency and create the best environment for ourselves and others.

Much of what is on television and the Internet these days is white noise, so protect yourself with some radio silence. Not quite sure how to detach from the media madness? Give me a buzz — I’ll help you march to the beat of your own drum in harmony with the independent soundtrack of your soul and keep away the Karma Police, who are there to remind you that you always have a choice.

Today’s PGG was originally posted on January 8, 2015

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

Facebook
Twitter
Instagram
LinkedIn
YouTube

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

As a career/life coach I have a unique vantage point to observe all types of people and notice certain trends and patterns that emerge. In addition to my clients, there is my circle of friends and family as well as my own personal experience, since I too am not immune to it all!

Lately the theme has been that of warrior being challenged in one or more areas of life, confronting unpleasant people or situations, dealing with loss, or relentlessly fighting a seemingly uphill battle at every turn. If you’ve been feeling tested (or testy) in the areas of relationships (all kinds), work (too much or not enough of it), finances (‘nough said), or having a health or identity crisis — essentially, the stuff of life — raise your hand and know that you are not the only one that’s been beaten up these past couple months.

As difficult as it may be, the key is to acknowledge and recognize through all the discomfort/frustration/stress where growth has occurred, understanding has transpired, and wisdom will eventually come. Don’t spend too much time figuring out why things have been going the way they have — instead, save your energy for what can I do and learn as a result of what I’ve been through and how can I incorporate these newfound strengths moving forward?

“Misery loves company” is a phrase we’ve all heard. It’s not a concept that I would normally promote, but in these times of technological isolation and social media’s “look at my fabulous life” updates and photos, there is comfort in knowing we’re not the only one struggling and it’s OK to share the truth of how we’re really doing.

The trick is not to have a pity party but to find community and provide mutual support; to take a collective heavy sigh and deep breath and have a good laugh about it, knowing that we’re all in a similar boat, and do what we can to make things better. At end of the day we are all human, and can offer one another a hug and a smile to get us through the hard times, which are always temporary.

If you want to dig a little deeper and sort out the who, what, why, when, where and how of what’s been going on, give me a buzz and I’ll help you see the lesson in the lickin’ and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Today’s PGG was originally posted on Decmber 14, 2010

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Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Synergy — the bonus that is achieved when things work together harmoniously.~ Mark Twain

I find it curious that the words desperate and disparate sound so similar; although their meanings are distinct and technically have nothing to do with each other, I think there is a correlation.

A well-known strategy used by one group to influence power over another is to “divide and conquer”; it keeps people, things, countries, ideas and religions feeling separate and often opposed to one another. This way they are unable to come together as a unified force and don’t have the strength to accomplish their goals and objectives, which disempowers them. It is an extremely effective tactic, regardless of whether the power desired or deserved outcome on either end is good or bad.

The most obvious place to observe this happening is in the military and political arenas, but there are more subtle ways that this truth can affect us in our everyday lives — within our families, at our jobs, in our neighborhoods, in the media and entertainment we consume, and often, within ourselves.

Lately I’ve noticed a lot of folks are feeling disjointed, fragmented and compartmentalized at best; discombobulated or defeated at worst. Everywhere we turn, there seems to be a sledgehammer creating wedges, with myriad of distractions coming at us from all sides: It’s us against them, head against heart, black vs. white, profit vs. people, logic battling intuition, young vs. old; material values vs. spiritual ones, mental vs. emotional health vs. physical health.

As the saying goes, we can’t serve two masters — we must be unified in that which we revere and honor, integrate our disparate parts and connect to who we are, so that we can connect to others for the greater good. Because when we don’t we feel lost and alone, which can lead to feeling desperate. And that is never a good place we want to be — because decisions made out of fear and desperation are never the best choices.

So if you’re having a little trouble synthesizing your yin with your yang, make sure you take some quality time with yourself and/or give me a buzz; I’ll help arrange all your internal and external parts so just like Stevie and Paul’s piano, they too can live side by side and you can live with yourself and others in perfect harmony.

Today’s PGG was originally posted on April 5, 2011

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin. ~ Matthew 6:28

Whatever occupies your mind the most becomes your god. Worries, if indulged, develop into idols. Anxiety gains a life of its own, parasitically infesting your mind. ~ Sarah Young

There is no need to seek the truth — just put a stop to your opinions! ~ Seng- Ts’an

I, like most humans, have my days of self-doubt and worry, lamenting about the past or catastrophizing the future, tying myself into all sorts of knots and getting into quite an unrelenting tizzy. However, because I practice what I preach and read what I have written, I have developed a certain level of self-awareness, self-regulation, trust and acceptance, so I don’t experience those kinds of days often. But when they do occur, boy are they doozies!

I have finally noticed, though, that when this happens, it’s pretty much always the same things that come up and cascade into a ridiculous (but not in the moment!) shame spiral, thinking I am worthless, I haven’t accomplished anything, I am all alone on this planet, etc., etc. I realized that when this happens, it’s like a switch is turned on that puts me into a very particular loop that keeps going round and round. And because it’s a loop with well-worn grooves, it’s hard to get out of and you feel like it’s reality. But it’s NOT. (BTW, this is basically a simplified version of established neuroscience …)

When such states arise, my go-to tools to release and get myself out of those conditions — like crying, movement, or sounding — don’t always cut it. When you’re dealing specifically with a deeply ingrained loop, what I discovered is that you can’t be gentle — you need to forcefully INTERRUPT THE LOOP. Just saying something like “NO, I’m interrupting the loop!” seems to work. You need to short-circuit that sh*you-know-what.

You have to be tough. Don’t be fooled by your mind with all the stories it’s making up, the judgments it has about you and others, the past it’s holding on to, the present it’s trying to control, and the future it thinks it can plan. They are all LIES!

So like my aforementioned “interrupting the loop” tactic, when these falsities and self-sabotaging stories come up, just emphatically say — out loud, with force (and maybe even a finger point) — LIES! LIES! LIES! Yes, I realize this might sound and feel a bit odd, but if it works, who cares?! Sometimes our system needs a shock to get results and break out of a pattern. I would prefer to be the shock to my own system, thank you very much….

No matter what the scenario you are dealing with, be sure to remember your breathing, be present, tune in to Nature. A tree doesn’t complain, a bird doesn’t compare, a flower knows it will bloom and one day wither and die but thinks no less of itself at any point in the journey. None of them worry.

Trust yourself, the deepest part of yourself, which is connected to something greater than yourself. Do something every day to help access that more and more, as it takes effort, attention and practice — until it doesn’t.

We need these reminders often (well, at least I do!) to discern what is true and what is false about ourselves and the world around us. Remember who you are.

Not sure how to separate the wheat from the chaff in that mischievous mind of yours? Give me a buzz and I’ll help call out the lies and liberate you from your loop, so you can become that beautiful, peaceful, loving lily you were born to be.

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG eNEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

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Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

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Actors, when interviewed about their craft, often talk about finding out what the “truth” of the situation is for their part; Shakespeare tells us, “All the world’s a stage, all the men and women merely players.

We are all characters in our own play or movie acting out daily scenes, but it’s easy to forget that we’re also the producers, writers and directors, especially when it comes to our relationships. We can, to a certain extent, cast who is in our life, assign them certain roles and create all the drama, comedy and tragedy we want. We can even rewrite the script when we have the courage to do so.

The best way to do this is to be honest with yourself so that you can communicate from the heart exactly what it is that you want and need. Since most people don’t walk around with ESP, it’s really up to you to say what you mean and mean what you say (in an appropriate way, of course!) and let the chips fall where they may, knowing that you honored what is real and true for you.

If it’s not a common practice, speaking your truth can feel uncomfortable, even messy, and can make you or the other person feel like a deer in headlights — but at least you’ll get to the bottom of things and set the stage to make the next scene better.

You can run but you can’t hide from the truth, and telling it to yourself is the first step. If you’re too scared or unable to see it, give me a buzz — I can be the spotlight that illuminates what’s really going on and help you create the starring role with a happy ending you so deserve!

Today’s PGG was originally posted on May 18, 2010

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG eNEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

Facebook
Twitter
Instagram
LinkedIn
YouTube

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

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