The Saturday before Superstorm Sandy, I was at a Halloween party. The host went to town with decorations and had massive floor to ceiling spider webs in several corners. Little did I know what foreshadowing that would be for the week ahead!

Four years ago this week we were on the eve of a historic presidential election, after a historic financial disaster. That Fall, the unimaginable became imaginable on both fronts when we chose our first Black president and watched the implosion of the stock market and our banking system. This woke us up in more ways than one, and both divided and connected us.

Fast-forward to today, and we are on the eve of yet another historic election, the outcome yet to be determined, and post another disaster, this time a natural one, which is hitting us materially as much as anything else. And we are even more divided, yet more connected than ever.

After the financial crisis of 2008, because of the actions of a relative few that rippled throughout the world, at the very least we were forced to deal with our addiction to credit and consumerism, and at the worst lost our homes and jobs because of it. Now it’s Mother Nature aided by the man-made contribution to/ignorance of climate change who teaching us that lesson with a more visceral punch as we recover from power outages and gas shortages at the least, and physical destruction of our property and loss of life at the worst.

Since this hit the tri-state area, because of its special density of population and unique connection to the global as well as local economy, no one is exempt from this lesson, as everyone has been affected in one way or another — it’s just who, what, when, where, how and level of gravity that varies.

In the middle of the storm, the façade of an apartment building in Chelsea was ripped off, showing a dollhouse-like view of the inside, a symbolic representation of what is happening to us physically and emotionally as the walls and structures between and around us are being torn down in order to reveal the truth of our lives.

Our interconnectedness and vulnerability have been thrown in our face — not only through weather, power, gas, goods and services, transportation and social media, but relationally too. How long can you coexist in the disconnected dark, live back at Mom’s, stay at your friend’s, or sleep with strangers at a shelter 24/7? How many days can you work from home, or miss work altogether, or have three-hour commutes, or wait hours in line for gas without losing it?

Community is a funny thing in New York — we like the anonymity and self-sufficiency of living on top of each other and the illusion of togetherness that brings, but actually having to interact and be with each other and ask for or receive help is another story.

People have mentioned how Sandy is too “nice” a moniker for what she did, but just like the gentle soul of Frankenstein for which she was also named, there is goodness to be found underneath the external horror of her monsterous appearance. She is asking us to come together like never before and question the deepest meaning of our lives; she is forcing us not only to realize but to actually experience the ways in which we are now more connected than ever, more interdependent than at any other time in history. And it is a gift because experience is usually the only way we humans learn, and that, as painful as it may be, is something to be grateful for if we choose to accept it as such.

Like big elections, these are the occasions when we focus passionately around something that impacts us all; they bring out the best and worst in us. We get to see people’s true colors, good, bad or indifferent; how flexible we can be; how generous and open-hearted we are, how we distill down what is vitally important, what is a necessity, and what is merely a luxury — or when suddenly those necessities become luxuries after not having them for a few days.

Such events test our patience, politeness, perseverance and willingness to exist in the present. They also shows us the incredible strength and spirit of humanity, our willingness to help one another, our capacity for leadership and organization, and our ability to rise to the occasion in times of crisis.

So remember, when we wake up tomorrow morning, no matter what the result of this election is, and no matter where you live in this country or on this planet, what we do know for sure, now more than ever, is that we are all in this together.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on November 6, 2012)

Click here for my explanation of why I chose this PGG today.

In the best-selling book Eat, Pray, Love, author Elizabeth Gilbert visits a holy man in Bali who gives her a meditation to smile in every part of her body, “Even in your liver.” This is a great way to activate the feelings of joy within. Just reading that makes you feel a little lighter and more relaxed doesn’t it?

Well, if that doesn’t do it, then what will? Whatever the thought or image is, make sure you get a daily dose in order to keep yourself young, happy and at peace. Doing so has numerous health benefits, and when identified and used properly, is cheaper and better than any diet pill, drug or food out there!

Whether savoring a scoop of gelato, relishing in a job well done, experiencing a romantic moment, or watching an episode of Glee, recognize and cherish those moments you feel joyful. Try to sustain and bathe in the sensations for as long as you can and be able to recall them when you need them the most.

I recently attended a friend’s musical, and for an hour and a half it had me smiling from ear to ear, and from my heart, gut and, yes, even my liver. If he had not followed his calling to create, I would not have enjoyed the positive mental, physical and emotional benefits that came along with it.

Everyone has the capacity to bring joy to the world, or at least to someone else. If you don’t believe me or are not quite sure how, gimme a buzz -because my work gives me such joy, it would be my pleasure, literally, to help you figure it out!

(Today’s PGG was originally published on May 4, 2010)

Click here for my explanation of why I chose this PGG today.

“A human mind is a wandering mind, and a wandering mind is an unhappy mind,” was the conclusion of a Harvard study whose research was conducted using an iPhone app. It is a sentiment that many religions and philosophies have proclaimed for centuries and can best be summed up by the popular phrase “Be here now.”

If researchers had a window into our minds, they’d see that we are almost never fully engaged in what is right in front of us, whether we’re thinking about the past or future, or simply not focused on the task at hand — and that causes unhappiness.

According to Andrew Bernstein’s book The Myth of Stress, it’s not the activity or situation that is the stressor, it’s our mind’s perception and reaction to the situation that causes the stress. By recognizing the reality of a circumstance and truly comprehending why it is happening, you can greatly reduce your adverse response to whatever is taking place.

I am always talking about process and “understanding where you’re at.” Most unpleasant situations you find yourself in are impermanent; by simply accepting that they are temporary, you can greatly increase your sense of inner peace and balance. Because life is constantly in motion you need to learn how to “go with the flow,” knowing that “this too shall pass.”

Remember that if you show up mentally, as well as physically, to that meeting, event or conversation, you’ve already done half the work, and the Universe can meet you halfway to create whatever it is you want or need.

Out of chaos always comes clarity. Need a little help living happily in the unknown and keepin’ it in real time? I can be a human app that checks in to show you how to make sense of and make the best out of any situation you find your present self.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on Novemeber 16, 2010)

Click here for my explanation of why I chose this PGG today.

I always like to remind folks who attend my talks that we are living in extraordinary times. Now more than ever we need to listen to our hearts and march to the beat of our own drum. Yet we are not solo performers on this stage – but more like duets, with the Universe as our partner – in what I like to think of life as the dance of life. There is ebb and flow, push and pull, reap and sow.

In our technologically advanced, left-brain evolved world, we think we can do more and know all the answers in making things happen for ourselves. But the truth is that we are only half the equation: the Universe, with its great unknown and unseen power, process and nature, is the other half.

There is a sublime order to things in our world if we only allow ourselves to honor it, regardless of how long our journey takes or what form or shape the fruit of it bears – and the Universe always knows better than our little pea brains. There is a method to its seeming madness and oft-lengthy timeline, but the more we resist its infinite wisdom, the more we suffer, the more mess is made, the more there is to clean up, and the longer it can take to get back on track.

Instead, we must learn to go with the flow – not in a loosey-goosey kind of way, but with faith and confidence, like a farmer planting his seeds, in knowing that the sun will rise tomorrow and that what comes up must come down.

Any artist, dancer, musician or athlete understands that practice and technique will only get you so far; at some point you have to let go and allow the Universe do its thing. In other words, no matter what you are working toward – getting a new job, growing a business, reaching health goals, or improving relationships – you need to simply “do your best and surrender the rest.”

If you haven’t seen the external results you desire, take a moment to slow down and reflect. If you’ve been paying attention, you’ll notice you’ve been undergoing some major inner reconstructing and re-arranging of molecules, experiencing a deep emotional and mental detox encouraging you to let go of the past in order to move forward; this too is part of the dance. Sound familiar? If not, and you’ve been feeling blocked at every turn, ignoring the call to do this type of internal work is probably to blame, and is easy to correct.

The beauty of dancing with the big U is that that once you get in sync with it, things actually get in sync with you, and stuff starts to happen, as I always say, “in time and on time” – and often more miraculously than you could have ever imagined.

Not sure of what steps to take next or feeling like you wanna rock right now? It Takes Two to make a thing go right, so give me a buzz and I’ll help you make it outta sight!

(Today’s PGG was originally published on Novemeber 12, 2013)

Click here for my explanation of why I chose this PGG today.

Independence Day is one of my favorite holidays for a variety of reasons, and not just for the day off, barbecues and fireworks. America’s birthday holds special place in my heart for the idealism it inspires and the respect and gratitude I have for the wisdom, sacrifice and most of all, courage that our Founding Fathers displayed that fateful summer of 1776.

As I always mention in my seminars, the root of the word courage is “cor” the Latin word for heart. This means that anything requiring courage is something that comes from the heart, from a place of deep love, a passion for what is pushing oneself to do.

The Founding Fathers’ profound love for Life, Liberty and Justice laid the foundation for the birth of a nation that promotes the growth of its most precious natural resource — the freedom of its citizens, i.e. We the People — to use our time and energy as we see fit, expressing ourselves and living a life we choose that is without harm to others. Because of the diversity of the 13 colonies, each with its own interests and identity, the ideal at the time had to be compromised regarding the institution of slavery in order to gain a unanimous vote for independence from England…But we had to start somewhere, otherwise we might really have been affected by Kate [Meghan] & Will’s [Harry’s] nuptials across the pond, or all our TV hosts would be British…oh wait…

Our country is by no means perfect and will continue to have its ups and downs, but ultimately it’s up to each of us to make it the best we can. So what will your contribution be to this great experiment? How will you leave your symbolic “John Hancock” on history?

One thing we can all do is make the question Where is the Love? obsolete in our corner of the world. Each of us can exercise that freedom 24/7, so be sure to consistently unleash your love on that special someone, your work, your friends and family, community, a cause, the nation, the planet, strangers, and life itself.

You say you want a Revolution? Give me a buzz and I’ll help you ring the Liberty Bell in your life because we are all Free to Be … You and Me.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on July 5, 2011)

Click here for my explanation of why I chose this PGG today.

The mark of the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of the mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one. ~ J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

Growing up is hard, love. Otherwise everyone would do it. ~ Kim Harrison, Pale Demon

It is our responsibility as nations and citizens to take care of each other and this planet we inhabit. But all too often it seems we forget that we have any say or power or control over our lives and environment as we go along in our daily routines — Mother Nature has her way with us; radical terrorists and out-of-control law enforcement use violence in extreme ways to threaten us physically and psychologically here and abroad; our government legislates what we should eat, think, and do with our bodies; and corporations use advertising, lobbying and Hollywood tell us who we are, what we should buy, believe in, and vote for, and what we should or should not be doing with our time, money and energy.

And in our private lives, we tend to rely on others — whether your parents, spouses and partners, friends, doctors, teachers, boss, news outlets and conventional wisdom — more than we should, and are more overwhelmed and distracted than ever with the consumption of digital media via accompanying gadgets/appendages. As a result, we forget we can have a unique opinion, make more conscious decisions that go against the grain, and above all think for ourselves rather than just absorb and digest (literally and metaphorically) what is being offered, served, or shoved down our throats.

When you’re a child, you generally have no choice or don’t know better and have to accept the status quo of whatever the adults around you say goes, but as you get older it’s time to check in and ask yourself, Who’s Your Daddy now?

Relationships are the glue that hold the world together and gives meaning to our lives; they include our relationship to ourselves, each other, our country, the Earth, and the Universe/God/Higher Power/ Nature. But when we allow a relationship to anyone or anything outside ourselves to be the ultimate authority over us — whether with a parent, child, friend, the government, social media or zeitgeist — we are giving up our individual power to control our destiny and prevent ourselves from emotionally maturing. These are the types of unhealthy dependent relationships, rather than healthy interdependent ones, that are causing our planet to fall apart.

Growing up means taking responsibility for every aspect of your life. Many of us prefer to remain in a half-baked adulthood that never really evolves to its full potential because we are too busy or distracted to see who is really in control — and because it’s easier to pop a pill or let someone else take care of it. But it requires courage, elbow grease, and internal effort every step of the way to be who we are truly meant to be.

We all have to do our part to take ownership of our environment, health, and happiness in mind, body and spirit. No one else can do this for us. By becoming stronger in who you are you can then use our full power and potential to help those who cannot yet help themselves, and create structures and systems from microcosm to macrocosm that will support a sustainable and peaceful life no matter who you are or where you are from.

Still feeling like a Toys ‘R Us kid? Give me a buzz and I’ll help you mature into a full-fledged self-mama or self-papa (without losing that essential childlike sense of play!) so that we can create a global village of audacious authentic adults.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on September 25, 2014)

Don’t it always seem to go, that you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone. ~ Joni Mitchell (via Janet Jackson)

I recently read that we have about 100 billion neurons in our brains, which also happens to be the approximate number of stars in the Milky Way, further illuminating my belief that “macrocosm and microcosm are mirrors of each other.”

We are all experiencing some facet of the same reality, some piece of a greater whole (which is why so many of you wonder how I could know what’s going on in your life every week…!). Until we start to truly comprehend that concept, there can be no real progress and we kiss that bright shiny future goodbye.

At some point in our lives we have all suffered or have been witness to the loss of loved ones, a job, our health, money, minds, homes, pets, friends, freedom, security, dignity, identity and the list goes on. And it seems like we’ve been losing more than ever over the past several years, doesn’t it?

When so many experience loss at the same time, it provides an opportunity to bond and elicits an empathy that might not normally be there. The challenge is to keep this awareness on a daily basis so we can honor each other and appreciate what we have when we have it, but at the same time be sure we don’t fall into a perpetual pity party or throw in the towel, because if we work at it and are patient enough and have the right perspective, Things Can Only Get Better

Loss also moves us to seek purpose and meaning and to recognize what is important in life, which is pretty much the same for everyone. The more of us who embrace that fact, the more we will desire and take responsibility for creating peace and understanding in our own worlds.

Looking for a little more Kumbaya these days? Give me a buzz and I’ll help you see that your glass is indeed half-full and there are silver linings all around you, channeling my practical Pollyanna to facilitate peace in your piece of the pie so that you always make the best of what you’ve got, way before it’s gone.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on September 13, 2011)

Synergy – the bonus that is achieved when things work together harmoniously.~ Mark Twain

I find it curious that the words desperate and disparate sound so similar; although their meanings are distinct and technically have nothing to do with each other, I think there is a correlation.

A well-known strategy used by one group to influence power over another is to “divide and conquer”; it keeps people, things, countries, ideas and religions feeling separate and often opposed to one another. This way they are unable to come together as a unified force and don’t have the strength to accomplish their goals and objectives, which disempowers them. It is an extremely effective tactic, regardless of whether the power desired or deserved outcome on either end is good or bad.

The most obvious place to observe this happening is in the military and political arenas, but there are more subtle ways that this truth can affect us in our everyday lives – within our families, at our jobs, in our neighborhoods, in the media and entertainment we consume, and often, within ourselves.

Lately I’ve noticed a lot of folks are feeling disjointed, fragmented and compartmentalized at best; discombobulated or defeated at worst. Everywhere we turn, there seems to be a sledgehammer creating wedges, with myriad of distractions coming at us from all sides: It’s us against them, head against heart, black vs. white, profit vs. people, logic battling intuition, young vs. old; material values vs. spiritual ones, mental vs. emotional health vs. physical health.

As the saying goes, we can’t serve two masters – we must be unified in that which we revere and honor, integrate our disparate parts and connect to who we are, so that we can connect to others for the greater good. Because when we don’t we feel lost and alone, which can lead to feeling desperate. And that is never a good place we want to be – because decisions made out of fear and desperation are never the best choices.

So if you’re having a little trouble synthesizing your yin with your yang, make sure you take some quality time with yourself and/or give me a buzz; I’ll help arrange all your internal and external parts so just like Stevie and Paul’s piano, they too can live side by side and you can live with yourself and others in perfect harmony.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on April 5, 2011)

We seek out emotional intensity vicariously, because when we are emotionally numb, we need a great deal of stimulation to feel something, anything. So emotional pornography provides the stimulation, but it’s only ersatz emotion — it doesn’t teach us anything about ourselves or the world. ~ Miriam Greenspan, psychotherapist (via Brene Brown)

One of the most popular singers today, Adele seems to unite us all with her deeply felt ballads and powerful, rich delivery, as illustrated so well by this SNL video. It’s a funny premise because it touches upon some profound truth, as she is one of the best-selling recording artists of all time due to her universal appeal; young, old, rich, poor, black, white, purple, no matter your nationality, religious or political affiliation — virtually no one can resist the temptation to be moved and sing along.

The Maori culture of New Zealand has a tradition called haka, an “ancestral war cry, dance or challenge performed by a group, with vigorous movements and stamping of the feet with rhythmically shouted accompaniment.” You can check out the rugby team’s haka for their most famous player’s funeral or this wedding video that went viral around the globe. My guess is that 99.99 percent of viewers had no idea what was being said/sung, but what makes haka and other similar native traditions so powerful is the absolute lack of artifice and 200 percent commitment to the raw, exaggerated emotion expressed; you can’t help but feel something stirred within you and respond emotionally in kind.

Sporting events, especially football, with its expanding audience and the Super Bowl essentially having the status of a national holiday, are one of the only acceptable forums where we can shout and scream and express our emotions to the max — joy, excitement, disappointment, frustration, surprise. If you’re not a sports fan, then stadium rock concerts can offer a similar opportunity as we enjoy head-banging tunes, raging against the machine, and belting our hearts out with longing, hope, despair, anger, passion and, of course, love. This is also what we see stirred up at political rallies, igniting people with emotions, good, bad and ugly.”

And because of the explosion of diverse media outlets, the content being created — movies, TV series, reality shows, and even “news” programs — keeps pushing the envelope to the extremes of sex, violence, revenge, horror and apocalyptic scenarios to get any attention. Social media is getting worse, always in a race to post the most salacious or silly videos, scandalous or outrageous memes and headlines in order attract the most click bait. And most folks can’t help falling for it, getting sucked in more times than they realize or care to admit.

These are also all shared experiences, or varying degrees of tribal experiences, activating a very human part of us that needs to connect and feel part of a bigger group. As we become more and more isolated and only virtually connected, these experiences become more rare and intensified as we advance in our technological age. And remember, emotions are contagious, so choose your tribes and tribal experiences wisely.

Whether it’s an Adele song, a demonstration of haka, a major sporting event, a viral video or a political rally, these experiences awaken emotions that we are becoming desensitized to, are covering up, or are embarrassed to share as we text and type without direct human contact, with our gadgets as legitimized interlopers. We are in danger of becoming robots ourselves.

Being able to feel is the most human trait we possess, and one that will ultimately separate us from artificial intelligence. The good news is that we are inherently rebelling: Our subconscious natural inclination to express our feelings is so strong that it is evidenced by the creation and widespread use of emojis! We simply cannot contain that part of ourselves, as emotion is essential to the way humans communicate if we want to be fully understood.

As I say in my talks, most people walk around emotionally constipated. We need to feel our feelings because the alternative is some unhealthy form of distraction, addiction or even violence. Learn to process your emotions; recognize and honor your feelings as they occur and then express or release them in an appropriate manner. That could mean talking it out; other times it’s just journaling. Sometimes it’s hysterically crying, belly-laughing, running for miles, dancing your butt off, singing, screaming or even moaning. Remember, emotion is “energy in motion,” so you need to let it move through and out of you, which is why those big stadium experiences, scary movies and power ballads feel so good. But they don’t have to be the only game in town if you cultivate your emotional health on a regular basis.

One of my favorite scenes in one of my favorite movies, French Kiss, is when Meg Ryan is frustrated with how French women have a way of interacting with men, masking or manipulating how they really feel rather than just being straightforward. She laments, “If you’re happy, smile, if you’re sad, frown; use the corresponding face to the corresponding emotion!” When we consistently feel our feelings and express them honestly to ourselves and others, we are able to communicate more effectively and gain a sense of inner peace and harmony. That means stop holding back or repressing our emotional selves, hiding behind our smartphones, or relying on “emotional porn” to give us the natural satisfaction and release that we require as conscious, sentient beings.

Not sure if you’re clogged up with a hodgepodge of emotions or if you only feel with the help of some outside stimulus? Give me a buzz and I’ll be your personal Roto-Rooter (wo)man to get things moving along so you can feel your own subtle or not-so-subtle emotions and go with your own flow — without always needing that bigger, bolder, in-your-face experience or to live vicariously through another’s.

(Today’s PGG was originally published on February 11, 2016)

Start responding to your life instead of projecting it. ~ Caroline Myss

All life is knowing, being, becoming. ~ Alan Watts

Mensch tracht, un Gott lacht (Man plans, and God laughs) ~ Yiddish saying

It’s easy to be consumed with all that’s happening in the world these days, and with social media, it’s ever-present and can feel quite visceral. And unfortunately, the truth is often distorted, hidden or framed in certain ways to evoke certain responses. But we need to be realistic about what we can and can’t control; we need to be knowledgeable and aware but not be drawn into a drama that is not ours or be distracted from our own lives. We must be discern when to take action and when to be an informed observer. I’m not saying this is easy; it takes practice and constant reminders, lest you get sucked in to the vortex!

It has always been my philosophy and mantra that “personal transformation is the key to social transformation.” Because ultimately, if we all focus on ourselves and cleaning up our own environments and spheres of influences, both internal and external, we will actually be doing our part to contribute to the collective versions as well.

When thinking about what I wanted to say as we enter a new year and new decade, I found the above silly Instagram story pic from a couple of months ago, and it seemed like a logical one to use. But the truth is, I don’t really set New Year’s goals or make resolutions. Every year my process is a little different – it’s more like intentions, themes and a general direction to move in with some specifics. But come Dec 31, I always review the previous 12 months to see what transpired. And if I didn’t achieve my “goals,” I can see very clearly what happened – and there is always growth, so I’m OK with that as long as I know I’m doing the best I can and at least progressing on some level, trusting that all is evolving as it should, as I like to say, “in time and on time.” (By the way, it’s not too late for you to do this exercise if you haven’t already!)

With this approach, you don’t have to start the year feeling bad or beating yourself up as long as you’re getting closer to rather than further from your desired aspirations and life trajectory. Some years are built for bigger moves than others – and remember that any change first happens on an internal level – so maybe that’s been the focus for you as it’s been for me. And the fact is that the outer stuff won’t happen if we’re blocked with inner stuff, so it’s just as productive, if not more so, to work on that. It can be less tangible, but no less significant or essential.

Or perhaps your “goals” have changed along the way. Because we may think we know what we want at some point – and may actually get it – but it isn’t always what we expected, or there may be some detours, decluttering, detoxing and/or healing along the way that prevent you from getting over the finish line when a calendar and culture says you should, but instead that sojourn is exactly on track with your own organic process of unfoldment.

In other words, when you’re in tune with your own rhythms and pay attention to what’s happening around you, you can respond minute by minute, hour by hour, and day by day accordingly. That way, you can shape the outcomes in collaboration with something greater than yourself that is moving you along in a direction you might not yet perceive or understand, but is ultimately for your highest good.

This is why it’s so important to be intentional about an overarching goal for your life, which really is just to know and become the best, most expressed version of who you are. And then everything else takes care of itself more effortlessly and clearly from there.

So be compassionate with yourself if your 2019 goals didn’t quite manifest. As long as you were taking action in the direction of your own becoming, trust you are exactly where you need to be and do what you can to continue that journey in 2020, which as we can see, is going to be a wild one.

And as I say in all my talks, you need to strengthen the security within yourself in order to adapt and adjust to the many changes taking place at this point in our history. Being in harmony and at peace with yourself and your own world would be a huge accomplishment to aim for this year and beyond as we make this transformation from microcosm to macrocosm – so remember to exercise those muscles as well as the ones at the gym!

Click here for the PGG with photo