Archives for posts with tag: stress management

A human mind is a wandering mind, and a wandering mind is an unhappy mind,” was the conclusion of a Harvard study whose research was conducted using an iPhone app. It is a sentiment that many religions and philosophies have proclaimed for centuries and can best be summed up by the popular phrase “Be here now.”

If researchers had a window into our minds, they’d see that we are almost never fully engaged in what is right in front of us, whether we’re thinking about the past or future, or simply not focused on the task at hand — and that causes unhappiness.

According to Andrew Bernstein’s book The Myth of Stress, it’s not the activity or situation that is the stressor, it’s our mind’s perception and reaction to the situation that causes the stress. By recognizing the reality of a circumstance and truly comprehending why it is happening, you can greatly reduce your adverse response to whatever is taking place.

I am always talking about process and “understanding where you’re at.” Most unpleasant situations you find yourself in are impermanent; by simply accepting that they are temporary, you can greatly increase your sense of inner peace and balance. Because life is constantly in motion you need to learn how to “go with the flow” and knowing that “this too shall pass.”

Remember that if you show up mentally, as well as physically, to that meeting, event or conversation, you’ve already done half the work, and the Universe can meet you halfway to create whatever it is you want or need.

Out of chaos always comes clarity. Need a little help living happily in the unknown and keepin’ it in real time? Give me a buzz; I can be a human app that checks in to show you how to make sense of and make the best out of any situation you find your present self.

Today’s PGG was originally posted on November 16, 2010

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Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

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Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin. ~ Matthew 6:28

Whatever occupies your mind the most becomes your god. Worries, if indulged, develop into idols. Anxiety gains a life of its own, parasitically infesting your mind. ~ Sarah Young

There is no need to seek the truth — just put a stop to your opinions! ~ Seng- Ts’an

I, like most humans, have my days of self-doubt and worry, lamenting about the past or catastrophizing the future, tying myself into all sorts of knots and getting into quite an unrelenting tizzy. However, because I practice what I preach and read what I have written, I have developed a certain level of self-awareness, self-regulation, trust and acceptance, so I don’t experience those kinds of days often. But when they do occur, boy are they doozies!

I have finally noticed, though, that when this happens, it’s pretty much always the same things that come up and cascade into a ridiculous (but not in the moment!) shame spiral, thinking I am worthless, I haven’t accomplished anything, I am all alone on this planet, etc., etc. I realized that when this happens, it’s like a switch is turned on that puts me into a very particular loop that keeps going round and round. And because it’s a loop with well-worn grooves, it’s hard to get out of and you feel like it’s reality. But it’s NOT. (BTW, this is basically a simplified version of established neuroscience …)

When such states arise, my go-to tools to release and get myself out of those conditions — like crying, movement, or sounding — don’t always cut it. When you’re dealing specifically with a deeply ingrained loop, what I discovered is that you can’t be gentle — you need to forcefully INTERRUPT THE LOOP. Just saying something like “NO, I’m interrupting the loop!” seems to work. You need to short-circuit that sh*you-know-what.

You have to be tough. Don’t be fooled by your mind with all the stories it’s making up, the judgments it has about you and others, the past it’s holding on to, the present it’s trying to control, and the future it thinks it can plan. They are all LIES!

So like my aforementioned “interrupting the loop” tactic, when these falsities and self-sabotaging stories come up, just emphatically say — out loud, with force (and maybe even a finger point) — LIES! LIES! LIES! Yes, I realize this might sound and feel a bit odd, but if it works, who cares?! Sometimes our system needs a shock to get results and break out of a pattern. I would prefer to be the shock to my own system, thank you very much….

No matter what the scenario you are dealing with, be sure to remember your breathing, be present, tune in to Nature. A tree doesn’t complain, a bird doesn’t compare, a flower knows it will bloom and one day wither and die but thinks no less of itself at any point in the journey. None of them worry.

Trust yourself, the deepest part of yourself, which is connected to something greater than yourself. Do something every day to help access that more and more, as it takes effort, attention and practice — until it doesn’t.

We need these reminders often (well, at least I do!) to discern what is true and what is false about ourselves and the world around us. Remember who you are.

Not sure how to separate the wheat from the chaff in that mischievous mind of yours? Give me a buzz and I’ll help call out the lies and liberate you from your loop, so you can become that beautiful, peaceful, loving lily you were born to be.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG eNEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

Facebook
Twitter
Instagram
LinkedIn
YouTube

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

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