Archives for posts with tag: self reflection

Do you have the discipline to be a free spirit? ~ Gabrielle Roth

In the movie Silver Linings Playbook, main characters Pat and Tiffany are in training for a big dance competition that turns out to be much more than a fancy booty-shaking contest. A unique romantic dramedy, it’s a film that shows there is a fine line between sanity and insanity, acceptable versus unacceptable behavior, and shows the beauty of living life to the beat of your own drum.

In the movie The Sessions, Mark O’Brien is confined to an iron lung 20 hours a day, existing on a gurney, unable to move from the neck down, and yet he writes poetry, is a professional journalist and decides to hire a sex surrogate so he can experience the most human of experiences. We go along on his journey (based on a true story!) and find him to be one of the most alive, loving and liberated individuals to have ever lived, despite such extreme physical limitations.

And as seen in the movie Lincoln, our 16th president is clearly not your Average Joe. He was always thinking out of the box, using his quirky sense of humor to defuse or illuminate situations, and taking numerous risks throughout the most heart-wrenching circumstances our country has endured. He stretched the Constitution to its limit, working within an established framework while implementing his own interpretation and/or bending the rules based on his hard-earned wisdom, keen observations and superior judgment as unprecedented needs arose and critical decisions had to be made in order for progress to occur.

In the conscious movement class I take, we are told to “dance it your way” and have breaks of “free dance” where we boogie as we see fit; it’s not chaotic because there is an organized structure and unity contained within the flow as we come back together intermittently as a group throughout the hour. It’s a super-small class because for many people, when given the opportunity to move and think for themselves, even for just a few moments, it is a daunting and uncomfortable feeling; it’s an empowering exercise that requires more effort and less inhibition, and many simply don’t know what to do if they are not following the instructor. And that, my friends, is indicative of a larger problem, with implications reaching far beyond a gym studio.

Spielberg’s Lincoln asks: “Can we choose to be born? Or are we fitted to the times we’re born into?” As citizens of the 21st century, we are certainly living in extraordinary times that will require us to become the fullest and most unique beings we are meant to be. We each have something that needs to be expressed, something that no other person on this planet — no one who has come before or will come after — can express. Right now we need new ways of looking at old problems and change old ways in order to deal with new problems, so it’s more important than ever for you to do your own thang, because there is no other way to generate inspiration and birth to innovation.

In any era it’s easy to get stuck in past habits and sucked into the zeitgeist of the day. Resist the urge to follow the herd, fight to honor yourself, think and speak your own thoughts, and begin to know yourself and create yourself anew every moment of every day — instead of getting swept up by social media, news, commercials, and even your peer groups, work and ethnic cultures or family and friends who are all, consciously or not, forces that can easily grab hold of your mind, body, spirit and/or bank account. Don’t let your physical characteristics, family roots or societal dictates squash all the rhythms inside you that might be quite different from what those outside influences might have you believe, say or do.

Not sure exactly what your groove thing is? Give me a buzz and I’ll get you started with some basic choreography and point you in the right direction, because ultimately You Should Be Dancing your own steps throughout life, hopefully with a fun disco floor beneath your feet along the way!

Today’s PGG was orginally published on January 18, 2011.

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Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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If a human being dreams a great dream, or dares to love someone…If a human being dares to be bigger than the condition into which he or she was born, it means so can you… I am a human being, nothing human can be alien to me. ~ Maya Angelou

And what a human she was! Dr. Maya Angelou possessed and cultivated a creative and brilliant mind, a powerful and compassionate heart, a flair for the dramatic, a serious sense of humor, and a thorough appetite for all aspects of life. She was a phenomenal woman who spent every breath of her 86 years consciously striving to express the fullest embodiment of what it means to exist as a spiritual being in this physical world.

To me, this is her greatest legacy. Like my other six foot tall heroine Eleanor Roosevelt [for those of you who don’t know I’m a six footer myself ;)], she walked her talk, and therefore we all benefited. She served as an example for all she stood for and knew to be Universally true; she espoused the unity and dignity of people of every race and creed, recognizing that “we are more alike than we are unalike.”

And she was very aware that she was indeed human, and knew how dangerous it is to make people, like a Martin Luther King Jr., Gandhi, or Mother Teresa larger than life — they were all human beings and when we idolize or put them on a pedestal they become inaccessible and we think we can never be like them. Instead they should inspire us to be extraordinary in our own way.

In our youth-obsessed and advertising-driven culture, it is unfortunate that we give so little airtime to our elders like Dr. Angelou, Nelson Mandela or Grace Lee Boggs, because when we listen to the wisdom that nearly nine decades of being a person who has chosen to love, forgive, learn and grow, who allowed themselves to reflect, observe and evolve, they teach us how to live. They are lighthouses that remind us who we really are and where we should be going — and these days especially when one is extinguished it feels like an even bigger loss because they are rare gems and we wonder who is coming up the rear to replace them.

In my work I have the honor and privilege of helping you discover that no matter how old you are or where you are from, you have a unique way of leaving our planet a little better off than when you arrived — even if it is simply by virtue of your own healed life.

Some of my clients, as a result of our meeting, have already gone on as a to win Tonys and Fulbrights, or are on their way to becoming a media moguls, best-selling authors, cutting edge inventors, or warriors for justice; whether they have an Ivy League background, were formerly incarcerated or are a ninth-grade NYC public school student, every one of them has something to offer, an opportunity to improve their own world, a way to be the most human they can be.

Not quite convinced that you, too, can be a giant among us? Give me a buzz and I’ll show you how like those Redwoods of California, you are one of hundreds of special trees that make up a forest of awe-inspiring majesty and beauty, living in harmony with one another and Earth, and the very Nature of Life itself.

Today’s PGG was orginally published on June 4, 2014.

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

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Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

Mental happiness is total relaxation.~ Yogi tea bag

Just as I was going to work on this PGG, I made myself a cup of tea, and of all the messages I could have received on the little tag, I got the one above. Thank you Universe for confirming what I am about to write!

I’ve been through a lot these past few years, and my closest friends wonder how I manage to exist and do the work I do. My response is always that I practice what I preach and there are many tools in my toolbox; I use them all, but one of the easiest to access, yet hardest for many people to apply, is the simple act of doing nothing.

When I say nothing, I mean NO THING. No doing, no thinking, no feeling (unless feelings come up), no reading, no TV or movies, no music (well, sometimes soothing music), not even meditating: JUST BEING. You can do this on your couch, in your bed, on the beach or in a park; you can sleep or doze or just be in a neutral state in whatever space you’re in. It’s about taking a conscious timeout on all levels to let your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual batteries recharge. It’s been my best medicine to remedy all that I’ve gone through and is better than any other food, drug or substance — and there are no side effects or hangovers!

My guess is lately you’ve probably felt like a warrior on the battlefield of stress, combating what feels like all the forces of nature against you. So think about it: Even if you haven’t been physically straining yourself with a sword and shield somewhere (and even if you are getting enough sleep), you have been exerting yourself on levels you might not be aware of and it takes its toll nonetheless. Hence the rest.

Most people rest only when they are forced to due to an illness or trauma to the body. But we also need to shut down after a period of mental and/or emotional turmoil, sustained physical exertion or sensory overload. Especially if you are an introvert or an empath, it’s easy to become subconsciously overwhelmed by so much coming at us from the outside, whether electronic ions, ubiquitous Wi-Fi, sound waves, disturbing images and/or picking up other people’s “stuff” in and around your environment.

Mind you, this is not being lazy or sick, and I’m not even talking about catching up on sleep (although that is critical if you need it); I’m talking about simply resting on all levels, and giving your body quality time to process, catch up, and heal on subtle levels so you can keep on keeping on in the most healthy way in mind, body and spirit.

Usually I rest after a particularly stressful experience to mitigate the effects of what I have just been through; other times it is more like a preemptive strike that my body intuitively knows to do to prepare for the challenges ahead. (Lately my technique has been staying in bed all day, but even a couple of hours are better than none.) And it’s not every week, or even every month, just when I need a stronger dose than my daily repose, depending on whatever is going on in my life. It’s a free, immunity-boosting powerhouse that reduces any potential infirmity, and it makes my mind clear and my energy able to handle whatever the task at hand may be, rather than slug through endlessly never feeling productive or operating at my fullest.

BTW, I’m sure there are scientific studies about this. For one, just think about when you exercise a certain set of muscles at the gym — the advice is always to have one day off in between to rest those muscles. That’s how they get stronger. Then there is the wisdom of oh-so-many traditions, which suggests (or mandates) some form of a Sabbath — because even God had to rest! But whether you are religious or not, this means you are consciously setting aside time to commune with your SELF.

Many folks can’t sit still for five minutes, let alone even consider spending an entire day in bed if they are not sick (or have some other condition like depression or ordered by a doctor). Because of our always on, go-go-go society, at first it’s easy to feel some sense of self-imposed guilt for not crossing out items on your To Do List or the FMO that comes along with shutting down; or you might think it’s some luxury you can’t afford. Start where you can, for however long you are able.

Think of it as being internally productive, because most healing we can’t easily see or perceive as it’s happening — like when we a cut or broken bone seems to magically gets better — and know that the investment in downtime saves you time and increases your external productivity in the long run. For instance, instead of squeezing out whatever you have to do on fumes over 8 hours feeling burnt out and suffering, use those 8 hours for quality rest FIRST, then bang out whatever you need to do in a very focused, refreshed and flowing 1–2 hours. Try it, you’ll like it!

In our increasingly stimulating world, most people are being controlled by their technology, rather than them being in control of it. Besides the daily grind of commutes, work and other obligations, there are always challenging cycles of adversity and intense situations to endure. It is essential to disconnect in order to process your activities and their impact, to sort out your subconscious and integrate all you experience. You need to be able to hear your own thoughts, feel your own feelings and think for yourself.

We must make a concerted effort to create the conditions to receive inspiration, download waves of creativity, have those aha moments, problem-solve and brainstorm new ideas. When you make rest an integral part of your life, you will find you can be more patient with family members and friends, spouses and significant others, kids and coworkers; you’ll be able to listen more effectively, be present and have more empathy with whomever we are with, and the world around us.

The more you develop and heed your resting muscle, the more you will be able to listen to your body — its infinite wisdom knows what is best for you at any given time. Heed that wisdom and your body will reward you. You will feel more centered and alert, and will naturally be more confident. And yes, there is something to what they call beauty sleep!

The bottom line is that we must impose our own YIN to our very YANG culture at this extraordinary time in history that is demanding our attention with the steady stream of stimulation, distraction, transition, emotional porn and more that we are subjected to 24/7.

Due to this reality, it seems as if everyone is dealing with some level of fear or anxiety and is feeling frazzled or out of control. Unchecked sleep deprivation and/or incessant stress on our minds and emotions can permeate our daily lives in insidious ways you might not realize because at this point you’re so used to it! However, when we’re well-rested, we see things more clearly and have the strength and wherewithal to handle whatever comes our way, rather than become ill or hopeless and/or explode in some inappropriate manner that could cause physical and/or emotional harm to us or others.And, if you rest on a regular basis you won’t need to binge eat/drink/whatever, and you might not even need to take a vacation!

The Roman poet Ovid so wisely wrote, “Take rest; the field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.” Want to make sure you have much to harvest throughout the year? Gimme a buzz and I’ll show you that when you make time for rest, you can be assured that life will bear fruit in every way!

Today’s PGG was oringally published on March 26, 2016

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Say It To Make It: Affirmations to Empower the Heart, Mind, Spirit and Soul

*Watch a fun video announcement for it here*

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your inbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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In case you haven’t noticed, change is in the air. It has been for a while now, but the pace is accelerating faster than you can say Speedy Gonzales.

Whether we are experiencing change via technology, elections, economic shifts, loss of loved ones, the effects of global warming, natural disasters or, in the most extreme cases, living in the midst of or fleeing war and/or genocide, it’s important to have as much clarity and strength as possible to weather such turmoil, and to have an inner resolve of peace and harmony that can carry us through when all around us has been anything but.

I recently saw the films The Promise and Their Finest, which take place during some the most tumultuous times on our planet, World Wars I and II, respectively. Although they are set in the past and in foreign lands, unfortunately the themes and similarities are all too close for comfort in the current political climate. Watching them only confirmed my sense of urgency about doubling down on living in the present, stopping even more to smell the roses and appreciating all that we have while we have it. Essentially focusing on our positive feelings, which at the core helps to maintain a state of peace in all its relative forms.

This is why practices like mediation, yoga, affirmations and other mindful activities I often prescribe to my clients are so important, now more than ever, not just for wellness, sanity and self-care, but for building up a muscle you don’t even realize exists until you are required to flex it in times of crisis and chaos. This is what will sustain you when the goin’ gets tough.

Another way you can build up that foundation of calm, centeredness and strength is to be continually conscious of the present, and really feel each good, joyous, peaceful moment as you experience it — not just by observing or having a positive attitude, but by integrating and absorbing them into your cellular memory so they can be recalled as needed down the line, and when you might least expect it.

Take advantage of every glorious encounter — even small but meaningful things like soaking in the sun on a warm spring day or having a good laugh with your bestie — by staying awake to your own existence, absorbing its essence and expressing gratitude for it on every level. This creates a storehouse for when the storms and stress arrive — as they inevitably will, such is the cycle of life — but you can then be more fortified and less influenced by the accompanying toxicity and dis-ease when they do.

Become hyper-aware of when you are enjoying moments of pleasure, connection, joy, love, beauty, justice. Although they, like everything in life, are always temporary, when you allow yourself to experience them more viscerally on all levels of mind, body and spirit, you are building up an internal stockpile that will serve you when they are in short supply.

Be sure to rest whenever you have the opportunity, and be disciplined about recognizing, seeking out or making it possible when you don’t.

Embrace and savor fully music, dance, food, conversation; listen deeply to your friends, kids, parents, spouse, partner, neighbor, strangers. Really hear and interact with them with every cell of your being. This is what builds up your reserves for those more isolated or disorienting and dehumanizing times. Remember your humanity.

Clean up and stay clear of any emotional, mental and physical clutter, so when situations and crises arrive, you can be fully present and deal with them by standing in the most enlightened, compassionate version of yourself.

Sink into the present as if the past and future don’t exist, because technically, at this moment they don’t. Learn from and then let go of the past. You cannot change what has already transpired, so no reason to regurgitate and relive it over and over, especially if it was a painful or negative situation — this is where forgiveness comes in! Get out of your head so you can be open to and grounded in the possibilities at hand. Therein lies our empowerment and salvation: our current thoughts, words and deeds are our building blocks, and the more aligned and aware you can be in your present intentions and interactions, the more fulfilling and peaceful your destiny will be, since you are the one creating it.

By being fully present, we can weave a future to be proud of and comfortable to live in, even in our darker hours. In other words, liberate yourself today by being in the here and now, and you will ensure a better tomorrow, even if it’s only your ability to cope more easily and successfully with whatever that future beholds.

In need of a little Ray of Light to illuminate the positive and keep it from flying by? Give me a buzz and I’ll help you slow things down and focus so you to feel like you just got home to enjoy the universe of goodies contained within it!

Today’s PGG was orginally published on April 25, 2017.

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

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Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

If you’re feeling a bit exhausted these days, even though you haven’t been “doing” as much as usual, you’re not alone. The amount of readjusting and shifting happening both individually and collectively, internally and externally, can be just as, if not more, exhausting than running a marathon! We’ve been through a lot lately, and there is only more to come, so rest your weary soul as your body and mind require it.

One thing contributing to the exhaustion is the amount of information coming at us, with a relentless urgency and intensity — sometimes warranted, and sometimes not — that is wearing on our psyches. And because there are so many disparate and contradicting viewpoints, sources, opinions, censorship and filters, it’s increasingly challenging to tell the difference between what’s true or not, and to see through any lies and confusion and/or disinformation — which all take extra energy. It’s become nearly impossible to know what’s what, except for the fact that we’re being stirred up to be as polarized as possible.

Because we each affect one another, what you can do to help mitigate that disharmony is find the places within yourself and your own world where you are polarized and disconnected. Where are you deceiving, deluding, denying and/or lying to yourself about any area of your life? Where can you make yourself more unified and WHOLE?

In other words, if you are feeling helpless or not in control, the best thing you can do right now for yourself, and the world, is focus on what truths you need to face about yourself and what you need to do to confront and heal them. This can be a painful and rude awakening, or maybe it’s a truth that you’ve known was there but have chosen to be in denial about or ignore.

The only way we are going to move forward in a healthy way, individually and collectively, is if everyone takes responsibility for healing their own life. Because when we don’t do that, unresolved pain can manifest as illness, projection, hatred, violence, scapegoating and/or relying on someone or something else to fix it — like a person, authority figure, drug or law. These are not the healthiest or most effective options, to say the least …

Look, I’m not saying this is an easy thing to do (i.e., I’ve been to the mattresses with myself the past week or two and it ain’t no picnic — not to mention the amount of Kleenex I’ve been through!).

But because of the way the Universe has set us up with these rare circumstances, it is a prime opportunity that can go one of two ways: either sink deeper into repressing our wounds and treating them with our various addictive behaviors — which could be as seemingly benign as Netflix, video games, social media scrolling, exercising, food, etc., that distract and numb you — OR, use the current restrictions and limitations to dig deep, see what’s going on in your heart and where the inner work needs to be done to become as whole and healthy as possible.

The fact is, our country and the world cannot be whole until its citizens are whole. Until we are honest with ourselves, how can we expect the government or anyone in a position of authority to be honest with us? We all need to do our part.

Today’s PGG was orginally published as a PGG Note on June 26, 2020.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

Facebook
Twitter
Instagram
LinkedIn
YouTube

Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself

Tell me what’s wrong with having a little faith in what you’re feelin’ in your heart. ~ The Dixie Chicks (via Patty Griffin)

I try not to think as much as possible. This serves me well for many reasons. First of all, I am somewhat dyslexic, so the more I stay out of my head, the clearer things are for me. And forget about speaking; whenever I do my seminars what I say has to come from my heart and gut, otherwise I would get super-confused and choke from stage fright and the fear of sounding stupid.

I have learned to operate this way more and more; it reduces stress by keeping me connected to myself and in the flow of life, in harmony with who I am and what I need or want at any given moment. It is the best motivational, decision-making and communications tool I possess, because I have harnessed and developed it as such.

In the movie Jerry Maguire, Tom Cruise confronts Cuba Gooding, Jr. about why he has not yet been offered a $10 million dollar contract, citing that the way he is off the field is how he needs to be on the field. “You play with your head, not your heart. in your personal life? Heart….Play the game, play it from your heart and you know what, I will show you the kwan. That’s the truth man, can you handle it?Jerry knew that if Rod did what he loved with love, then, and only then, would he be able to show him the money.

And that doesn’t just hold true in the movies. Steve Tisch, a proud owner of the NY Giants, declared that the key to their big victory this past weekend was that they ” …played with more heart, more passion, and more love for each other and for the game of football.” Does that negate, replace, or even diminish all the hard work, training, strategy, talent and skill necessary to achieve such great heights? No, of course not. But it’s the thing that will make the difference between a good team and a great team, a good life and a great one.

Most of us are taught to live by our heads, logic and ego, not by our hearts and guts. But only when we listen to our hearts and put love into everything are we our most authentic selves, which means living our truth. And when we are living our truth, we can then more easily speak our truth, and stand in our truth. And that is the best way to guarantee peace and prosperity in our lives, no matter what the circumstances.

Million dollar contract, Lombardi Trophy or not, we are all players the Super Bowl of Life — so are you playing with your head or your heart?

Give me a buzz and I’ll make sure that unlike Tom Cruise in his confrontation with Jack Nicholson, you can indeed handle the truth and start living in alignment with who you are and what you want to make happen both on the field and off!

Today’s PGG was orginally published on February 7, 2012.

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Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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When things aren’t quite going your way, it’s easy to fall into the grass-is-always-greener syndrome. But as the saying goes, before you judge a man (or covet his life), walk a mile in his shoes.

You don’t have to turn back the clock, eat a magical fortune cookie, ride in a souped up DeLorean or relieve yourself in an enchanted fountain to discover your life and relationships are exactly as they should be, or get the kick in the butt you need to make them better.

The fact is, our lives are the sum total of all the choices we’ve ever made up until this point — a combination unique unto ourselves. That means we have, on some level, created the situation we’ve wanted or needed in order to learn and grow on this journey called life.

So whatever your state of affairs, take full responsibility for it. The good news is that if you don’t like it, because you got yourself into it, you totally have the power to get out of it!

A lot of my clients right now are at the point of no return, where there’s no more delaying the inevitable. The only thing they can do is to go through — there is no way around, there is no way back — they need to make a change or take action in a certain direction because there’s no alternative, whether because of forced external realities or an internal malaise and dissatisfaction that they can no longer withstand.

Why changes haven’t been made up to now is a more complicated and varied topic for another time. Often it’s a stronger sense of obligation to others, what they want or would make them happy, that prevents us from moving forward to the beat of our own drum. But contrary to Hollywood movie plots, we are the ones who have to live in our bodies, so it’s up to us to do what needs to be done. It’s time to go big or go home.

Not fully convinced that you can move forward without going all topsy-turvy or time travel-y to get it right? Give me a buzz and I’ll be like a freaky fictional device that helps you wake up and smell the coffee. I’ll help you understand and appreciate where you’re at and what changes you can make so that you can learn and experience whatever you need to be the best you can be, Right Here, Right Now.

Today’s PGG was orginally published on September 25, 2012.

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

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Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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While making a purchase last week, I must have been subconsciously but overtly enjoying Pharrell Williams’ snappy tune which was playing on the store’s sound system. The cashier, a young gal probably not more than 21, asked me “Why do all adults love this song?

Ahhh, youth. First off, I needed to comprehend the fact that I was one of those “adults” she was referring to, which took me a minute because I think I’m 25…She continued, “Yeah, my mom and aunts and all their friends get into it whenever it comes on.”

The uplifting, catchy anthem could not have been released at a better time, after one of the harshest winters on record and accompanying the spring forward of our clocks signaling the imminent arrival of brighter days and warmer weather.

But I think the real gift is its simplicity — its airy, carefree, innocent vibe and powerful lyrics. It cuts through all the heavy stuff we deal with and are responsible for and asks our inner child to dance a little inside and out. Because let’s face it, we all need a break from the warmongering, negative TV shows/movies/video games, political bickering, and multitude of challenges modern life presents us “adults” with on a daily basis — even if it’s for only 3:52 minutes.

A friend of my mom’s who I’ve known over 25 years saw me recently, and with a very perplexed look and completely serious tone asked, “When are you going to start aging?”

I just chuckled. I suppose good genes and moisturizer play a part, but I really attribute it to my frame of mind and lifestyle — I have learned to take care of myself physically and spiritually, and have the tools and discipline to manage my stress (trust me, there is plenty!). I honor and process my emotions, think positive thoughts, and do my best to live in the present and go with the flow, listening to my deepest self and paying attention to the world around me. I operate from my heart (and gut) not my head and value quality over quantity in relationships.

I realize that I am on a journey, and as long as I’m learning and growing and being of service, I am doing something right. I am creative and know how to relax. I’m a practical idealist. I laugh often and cry just as much, if not more. I love. I am committed to being as authentic, balanced and centered as I can be, knowing I’m not “perfect” and that’s OK: I take one day at a time and understand that every problem is an opportunity in disguise, as hard as that might seem to believe in the moment. I am grateful. And lastly, I shake my booty to groovy tunes as much as possible. So yes, I choose to be Happy, because happiness is the truth — and one of the keys to youth.

Need a little help figuring out what happiness is to you? Give me a buzz and I’ll have you clapping along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do. I’ll be there to guide you one step at a time, and make it so can’t nothin’ gonna bring you down! Yeah.

[Fun fact: I had a truly magical interaction with Pharrell (my number one celebrity encounter, and I’ve had a lot) on a NYC sidewalk exactly 6 months after I wrote this PGG and got to give him a HUGE hug and thank him for the joy he inspired all over the world, since it became a global phenomenon that you can see on this playlist on YouTube.]

Today’s PGG was orginally published on March 11, 2014.

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If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

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Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Rules are mostly made to be broken and are too often for the lazy to hide behind. ~Douglas MacArthur

There are no rules here — we’re trying to accomplish something. ~ Thomas Alva Edison

One of my all-time favorite films is Strictly Ballroom for a variety of reasons, one of which is how the main character, a world class ballroom dancer wants to use his own steps in competition and the outrage and, ultimately, delight this causes. I’ve always loved to dance but hated formal exercise. Since I’m not out at the clubs much these days, Zumba and cardio salsa at the gym have filled the gap; but I never was into doing exactly what was presented — I generally stand in the back enjoying the music and sort of go along with the group.

I recently found a new class called Nia, which is perfect for me — it includes sections for “free dance” and encourages you to “dance it your way.” It kind of looks like hippie dancing, or what you might do if you were in your room when no one was watching; it’s a great workout that speaks to my body in a way that makes me feel good.

This time of year especially is filled with many traditions and routines, along with thoughts about the changes we want to make in the New Year. My mom has always made the holidays extra-special with borderline excessive (but not at all tacky) decorations around her home, and this year she just wasn’t feeling it. When I suggested she could put up the tree up with a few accent pieces instead of doing the whole Winter Wonderland/Santa’s Workshop, she thought it was impossible — it had to be all or nothing.

I insisted it could be done and took some of the items she put in the same place every year and used them differently. She fought with me tooth and nail, until I proved they would indeed fit in spots she said they wouldn’t. The house looks festive and the mission was accomplished; it feels like a maximum amount of decor with minimal amount of effort! But it was her resistance to change and incredulity that several options and alternatives existed that were the hardest parts to tackle — she simply couldn’t see any other way than how she’s done it year after year.

Tradition can be a good thing, but it’s important to know when those traditions and routines are serving or restricting us. Sometimes you just gotta break the rules, think out of the box, do it “your way”. Where we would we be without the hundreds and thousands of rule-breakers both known and unknown, in every field — especially the arts, science, fashion and civil rights?

But the truth is that often our most fervent rules and regulations have been totally self-imposed, and/or are no longer necessary. It’s easy to get caught up in doing the same old thing just because that’s the way we’ve always done it. Sometimes we need a fresh eye, another brain, to look at the same situation and come up with a new solution, a new way of doing things that we couldn’t see because you were too close or it was too engrained in our psyche.

Wondering if change will serve you better than reinforcing the “rules” you have in place right now, or which walls need to come Tumblin Down and be replaced with some new Moves Like Jagger? Give me a buzz and I’ll be the law enforcement that looks the other way and the instructor that helps you create the right combination of funky steps you can dance to the beat of your own drum!

Today’s PGG was originally posted on November 29, 2011

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Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

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Hello

I love myself

I love myself

I love myself

We are so happy to be alive

I love my life

Our lives are great

We love ourselves

We love being alive

“I Love My Life” ~ Song & lyrics by my special friend Zachary Miles Lefkowitz, age four and a half, September, 2013

When at a wake recently with my 14-year-old nephew, I recalled to him the time he was about to turn four and I asked if he was excited about his upcoming birthday. He began to cry hysterically saying he didn’t want to have any birthdays. This was because he spent a lot of time around my ailing grandmother who had just passed away in her 80’s and he made the very astute observation that getting older means you are one step closer to dying.

I asked now what it was about death that bothered him most. He did not hesitate for even a second and simply, and very seriously, said “Because you won’t have the exhilarating feeling of being alive.”

I thought this was a profound answer as folks around us were suffering with the loss of our loved one; Jake homed right in on the crux of the matter: We are alive, and we should experience and treasure every moment that aliveness brings us.

Over the weekend I had my first massage in over two years, and it really brought home to me these conversations in the most basic and visceral of ways. Being alive means we are here, in a very physical body in a very physical world. Our body is our vehicle to experience all that life has to offer, so we need to love, appreciate, and take care of it — and, we are also here with other human beings we are meant to love, appreciate, and take care of in a physical way.

Most of us tend to live in our heads and are quite disconnected from our bodies and/or emotions. Getting a massage — whether by a therapist or having a friend or family member give you a little hands-on tender loving care — affirms our beingness, our aliveness, and our connection to and need for one another. Numerous studies have documented the necessity of touch, especially for newborns and the elderly; it is literally what keeps them alive and determines their health and longevity.

Diana Ross famously sang, “Reach out and touch somebody’s hand / Make this world a better place, if you can.” If you’re lucky, you have close relationships where you can exchange physical, affectionate touch on a regular basis. If not, there are lots of alternatives like hugs and various forms of bodywork you can receive from others in appropriate ways and settings.

And sometimes the most special touch can come from a stranger , like from the tourist in Bryant Park over the summer who, while having her photo taken nearby sensed/saw me distraught and crying (even though I thought I was incognito with my sunglasses, hair covering my face and downward glance!), and in one of the most generous, kind moments I have ever experienced, gently put her reassuring, healing hand on my shoulder for a few seconds as she walked by, saying with that one gesture, “I see you, I feel your pain; I don’t know you, speak your language or know why you are upset, but I am here to offer you what comfort I can as a fellow human being.”

So as we go further down this technological highway with its isolating side effects and embark upon the holiday season with the increasing commercial madness it brings, remember the basics: you are here, we are here, let’s love our lives and love one another, and demonstrate that love and compassion in the most tangible and meaningful ways possible.

Not quite sure how? Give me a buzz, because like Robin Thicke reminds us: I got it. You got it. We got the magic touch.

Today’s PGG was originally posted on December 3, 2013

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CLICK HERE FOR FULL PGG ENEWSLETTER WITH INTRODUCTORY NOTE ABOUT CURRENT EVENTS

Get essays like this delivered every Friday to your mailbox as my PGG newsletter by texting CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to join my mailing list.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like what I write, you’ll love what I have to say in person!  

CLICK HERE TO BOOK ME AS A COACH

Click here for info about my coaching and speaking services and contact me today. 

Click here for some testimonials from past clients 

Click here for a video that explains some ways I can help you as a coach

**CLICK HERE FOR MY PODCAST-STYLE INTERVIEW WITH RICK YOUNG OF WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND RADIO SHOW**

Follow me on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter for up to date posts, helpful articles and inspirational thoughts.  Slowly building my YouTube channel so you check that out and subscribe too!

Text CLEARLYKRISTINA to 22828 to be added to my mailing list and be in the loop with my coaching and workshops as well as have these essays delivered to your inbox!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Check out this very-roughly-edited-not-the-best-quality video of uninterrupted remarks wrapping up the workshop “Lead Yourself to Success (in Work & Life!)” In this excerpt covering the final seven minutes, I summarize my thoughts about confidence, being a leader in your own life, maintaining your individuality and humanity in the times we live in, and why the world is relying on you to be successful.

Click here to watch video

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Read over 100 5-star “Yelp” style reviews here

Join Mailing List

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Read more about me and my work in these past PGG’s:

All Roads, Same Place | And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor | Strong Medicine | 10,000 Hours | A Decade of Doing What I Do | Express Yourself